And on Friday...she rested

What a week! Whew! Let me tell you a thousand things have happened this week that has my mind all a twitter (can one's mind be a twitter?).


First and foremost, officially CM is going to hire me to a permanent position. I accomplished all my goals and officially, had my last review today in which I had to role play and do crap like that. Ick. But that aside, I was very glad to hear that the feedback the pointy haired boss received from the UK folks was positive and glowing. Which, why shouldn't it be? Right? I am all that! So say I.


Next, the UK folk and the GREAT OFFICE OPEN HOUSE. I've been managing this event since I started and have silently watched as I morphed into an office manager too. I've bought many a things for the office to make it look like an office, ordered stationary and business cards, bought plants, signage and organized the place to be presentable. One of the guys in the office redid the org chart and put the plants I bought under me and titled me the "Plant Manager". Clever eh?

The day of the big event arrives and as the delivery folks are putting up these fantastic looking kiosks I realize (the event is in 2 hours mind you ) that I have not planned or found any sample work for said kiosks. You have GOT to be kidding me? How could I have let the MAIN reason slip through my paws? So flustered I hurried off to Office Depot (pronounced DEHPO if your a brit apparently) and voila...signage and holders for collateral and all good stuff.


The feedback from everyone was outstanding. Everyone had a great time, the place looked fantastic and the bottom line is more sales for us. The pointy haired boss had flowers delivered to me from the entire CM group congratulating me on a successful event. Aren't they pretty?


Finally, here is the office. Some names have been changed to protect the not so innocent.


From Right to left: The brit, PM DUDE, The SPS Guy, Techy Guy, Pointy Haired Boss, New Girl, Sassy Sales Girl, PM Princess (aka me), Tall Techy Guy from Oregon.


Just look at how beautiful that sign is. I kick white ass. I don't care what anyone says.


In other news, DMQ Anniversary show this weekend. Provided I can stay awake past 10PM I'll be dating with the boys on Saturday night. Blueberry and GalPal Margo (who said she'd date a tree at this point) will be joining me.

Rock on with your bad selves.


I had coffee with the Xcrush today. He fixed my wireless issue with my computer. Which wasn't the reason we met for coffee. No, he suggested it, if you can believe it. Boys are weird. It was fun though to sit and get caught up with him without feeling all twittery inside around him. He's still got whatever he is supposed to have to make me want to crush all over him. But at least I've move past all that. Really! I have!

Petechial Hemmoraging and other nasty stuff

I'm a big fan of crime shows. And I always love when they say "petechial hemmoraging". Mostly because I can't say the word "hemmoraging" and it gets me to say it. HemERAging, hemmaging...herAG-ing...whatever.

But I have petechial hemmoraging going on right now.

"Bring out yer dead! Bring out yer dead!"

"I'm not quiet dead yet"



As I was saying, I'm not dead yet, but things are not happy in JennLand.

Sunday I experienced something I hope to GOD I never experience again. I had a severe reaction to aspirin I believe. I had "cramps" (which will play into the later part of this story) and a slight head ache. Not being a girl who likes pain, I reached for the pain killers. But sadly I couldn't find my Tylenol. I found, instead, these nice little tablets I "borrowed" from Geeksoft. They're called "Pain-Aid". Very appropriately named for me...Pain = bad.

Only for some reason these little tablets I've taken a thousand times suddenly didn't like my system. I doubled over with most horrendous stomach cramps I've ever experienced. And I've experienced stomach cramps in my life - considering I inherited my mothers digestive track (thanks mom - smooch). But these were different. I could even stand up straight.

Now, I also must tell you I hate to throw up. HATE it. Yah, I know who does like it right? But most people do it just to get the pain over with. Not this girl. Throwing up is a direct indication that something is SERIOUSLY wrong. So as I laid in the fetal position on the bathroom floor in tears...I did it. I pulled myself up to the porcelain god and paid my homage. It was in fact so violent that I burst several blood vessels in my eye balls. It could be because my insides were screaming to get out of the captivity they were being held in. And I think my eyes thought they'd join in the exodus. Hours later I noticed that I had broken several blood vessels in my eyes and my face ( I've seen pregnant women with this after given birth - which I won't be ever considering now...)

That all being said I'm having other issues. Aunt Flow is visiting AGAIN. And let's just say things are not good with that regards.

I think I'm falling apart. I think my body is trying to tell me something and I don't think I speak its language.

I am, feeling better. Thanks for asking. I am just a bit concerned with regards to all that's going on.

And before you get all motherly with me...YES I have a doctor appt and a list to discuss with the dr.

Q-Tip: 1 King of the House: 0

The woman of this household has been working feverishly and hasn't had the time to post anything worthwhile (I suspect there are some of you who question if any of it is worthwhile). She leaves early (before 6AM & I'm barely out of my cat bowl yet) and comes home WELL past feeding time (which is, effectively, all day).

Since she's been gone "hunting" (that's what she tells me she does all day. I have my doubts since I am quite sure anything that can be killed doesn't come in a tin can) I find my ways of amusing myself.

My latest adventure has been with this little cotton sticks the woman calls "Cuutips". The woman has a jar of them on her bathroom counter. It seems she uses them to apply odd smelling and atrocious stuff to her face and she uses them to brush her ears or something like that. I, on the other hand, have found a new and EXCITING use for them. I found I can pick them out of the jar as the woman has no lid on said jar. Once I hunt down and pick a "victim" I toss it merrily into the air. It generally lands on the floor. Though I've been known to have excellent aim and have it hit the bit water bowl. That I found doesn't agree with me as the games over at that point.

Generally speaking if it lands on the floor, its fair game. These "cuutips" are curious creatures too, they disappear on me sometimes. I innocently send them flying into the air, and sometimes they never come down. But the woman, she's the master of hunting, because she finds them all the time, which is then followed by her war cry that goes something like this, "Pookie - for the love of Pete."

Yesterday the woman was startled and stunned to find one of my "lost" chases in a shoe. She put the shoe on and wobbled around wondering what the...was in the shoe. Upon removing said shoe she found my lost toy. Yipee. Woman: 1

Last weekend she moved my lounging throne and found a couple, too. I have yet to determine where those are hiding now.

I should probably admit at this point that I don't actually "lose" them. No. Instead I distinctively and artfully "place" them so the woman can find them. She does need to hon in her hunting skills, so I figured I could help out a bit.

And finally, to those of you who pleaded with the woman to feed me more. Your pleads, I fear, have gone unheard. She now is not only feeding me more, but she's telling me that we are going on an adventure to a new land called V.E.T. I can hardly wait to throw up in the car.

Help Wanted

Recently, I've been asked to help with the recruitment of new hires in the US. It has absolutely nothing to do with proj mgmt, but I'm willing to help out.

In light of that, my co-worker sent me this. Enjoy!

And now a word from our sponsors

Hello,

My name is Pookie. You might know me as the Big Black Beast of Burden. A name, I assure you, of which I do not approve. The woman (aka my maid) finds it amusing to call me such silly, whimsical names. She knows full well my name mean honesty, strength, and power: PookieSnackenBurger. The Lord. I've applied to make the Sir PookieSnackenBurger esq.

I need a nap. That paragraph was a lot of work.

Thank you for waiting. Now where was I? Oh yes, the Lord of the apartment.


This is me on my new found throne. The woman tells me I don't belong up here, but what could she possibly know about royalty? I mean, seriously. She cooks for herself! She works! Whatever.

The new throne has an excellent view of my kingdom outside. I've not actually been through my kingdom, but I protect it with vigor any chance I get. The occasional Mr. Hands (the woman calls him a ra-coon) has to be scared away by my roar! I also have a mysterious feline that walks through my domain and stops to stare at me. I stare back and stare him down until he leaves. The woman says if she opened the door I'd be dead and shredded. I assure you that is not the case. I am cat. Hear me roar!


This is the throne in the anti-chamber (the woman calls it the lehving ruum). I have a kickass view from this fluffy, coushy thrown. I finally have asserted my weight just right so that the pillow of which I lay folds in nicely to conform to my body. What a view eh?

I do have a few complaints that must be heard. No one else seems to listen to me, the lord. So I'll use this forum to vent. I understand from the woman that people "reed" here and make "comments".

Complaint #1


The Blue Monster of Death - why? Why does the woman feel the need to invite that ... that... thing over once a week. It sucks up all my beautiful fur I've left lying around. Clearly, the woman doesn't understand I have a right, I owe my people, to cover all ground, furniture, bed linen, and clothing with my fur. Once everything is covered, I could rest. But no. She and that robot sucks it up every week and I have to start all over. Whoa is me!

Complaint #2


The food dish. See. Just see how I must live. That food dish isn't 100% full. The woman has decided that 1) my food dish does not need to be full and 2) I do not require the wet, succulent food every day. She is wrong. Please. I beg of you. Tell her I need that wet food daily. The side of the can says it will promote my shiny coat.

Complaint #3

My complaints. I spout them off all day long and in her presence. Yet all I get back from her is lip. She goes on and on about me being spoiled and the cutest cat in the apartment. Um...dah! I'm the only cat in the apartment. I'm smart too. Please? Ask her to listen to my complaints. If she does, I promise to not hork on her new shoes again. (I swear the last time was an accident. I swear.)

This is all for now. I'm excited to see I now can reach ALL my loyal subjects through this medium.

Do you remember Captain Kangaroo?

So stick with me on this one? You're about to embark on a trip through my mind. Scary as it may be. Hang on!

I thought Captain Kangaroo wore green overalls. And for some reason I want to call him Mr. Green Jeans, but then I realized Mr. Green Jeans was a character on the show (For the record, he is one scary looking person).


Why am I thinking about green jeans? Well, because I'm about to buy plants. And during the plant shopping extravaganza all I could think about was Mr. Green Jeans, and Captain Kangaroo.

See the connection?

Yah, whatever.

Anyhow, anyone who knows me, knows I am not a gardener. Never have been. Never wanted to be. Never interested. Now, suddenly, I have this hankering to buy plants to put outside on my deck. I have a nice little patch of dirt that is just screaming for plant life...aside from the weeds that are currently growing there.

Now, without any really provocation, I can't stop thinking about putting plants out there. I was shopping for office plants today (don't ask) and spent a good part of time, learning about other plants that might fit well in my little green patch. And I priced out bark to put around them to make it look pretty.

I hate yard work. Hate it. And now, in my advancing age, I apparently wouldn't mind doing a little gardening. WHAT THE HELL IS HAPPENING TO ME?

If someone finds my mind, would you please return it?

Ain't it just my luck

Anyone who knows me, or who has read this blog for longer than a second, knows about my several misadventures with men. Apparently Mike's are not my game as each one in my life at one time or another broke my heart (they've all been forgiven by now).

The other "issue" I've had with men is becoming attracted to them, I find out they're gay. Just my luck right.

So, rewind momentarily to my traffic accident just about two weeks ago. Remember BeemerBoy - who hadn't contacted me originally. Finally. I say finally, he contacted me and provided me with his email address. I immediately sent off an email to get the ball rolling to get this fixed. To my surprise he responded and copied his HUSBAND on the email. Now remember if you will my mother's reaction was "Is he married?" Funny, I don't think she meant was he married to another man!

I blame the cold medicine

Yes, kids I'm still sick. I hate it. I hate not being able to do things. And I hate being completely tied to the end of a Kleenex. BTW, you should buy stock in Kleenex considering my current situation.

And what is my current stats:

(you know you want to know)

2 bag of Halls Defense Vitamin C cough drops - they're da bomb
15 calories per drop and about 30 drops per bag...you do the math. But since I'm not eating anything I figured all calories through cough drops and cough syrup are fine.

2 boxes Kleenex - working on the third.

2 quarts miso soup

lost count of the amount of water and ice tea I've had.

Approximately 80 hours of sleep in the last 72 hours.

1 bottle of NyQuil - working on my second. They were small bottles so relax

And lastly, one hot totty. I had to. I remember way back when, my dad made me one when I was sick. Totally knocked me out and I slept for hours. Woke up feeling 10X better.

15 - the number of cold remedies people have recommended to me. (one being eating a whole clove of raw garlic - which I may just have to do.)

Finally, I'm siding with the Patron Saint on this one, it amazes me just how much snot a body can make. Easily 20 lbs of snot. Easily.

I am, finally, at work today, for at least a few hours. If I don't work I don't get paid...and if I don't get paid, then I don't eat...which I guess isn't a bad thing.

I'm sick and its not berry fuddy!

The snow is gone, thank god. But in its place we have rain. Which I don't care one bit about.

What I do care about is this nasty cold that has taken old of me. It came on fast and appears to be settling in for the long haul. I hate being sick. Not that anyone really "likes" it, but I think some people tolerate it better than others. I hate it because it slows me down.

I think I might have mixed cold medicines last night and probably shouldn't have. I had some wicked wicked dreams and woke up to a phone ringing, a friend calling me to find out where I was. I was supposed to meet her for breakfast and I completely forgot. The cold medicine fog. Its similar to the post drinking fog, but this isn't nearly as much fun.

A friend recommended Zycam to battle the cold. So I took that yesterday and didn't pay attention to when. Then when I hit the bed at 6:30 PM I took a big, long, swig of Nyquil. (God's gift to the sick). The combination I think might have contributed to weird dreams I had...and I know it contributed to the foggy brain this morning.

I'm beat. I'm gonna go take a cough drop and settle into my new flaming blanky (Thanks Vicky! I love it by the way) and watch the food channel all day.