Okay, maybe a little. But I come by it naturally. I have come to love and cherish my cynical side. I just need to put that side away sometimes and learn to allow happy thoughts of hope to creep into my psyche and know that it won't hurt. It may scar, but it won't hurt.
What the hell am I talking about? I can hear you saying that now. I have bionic ears you know. Which, by the way, if I were ever to be granted a bionic option, ears would not be my first choice.
Anyhooooo...
The job front. So the Boeing job and the wireless job both well, sank. Which left me with my original job I so desired at Content Master. They had to postpone their hiring due to other internal hiring priorities. But now they're back and so am I.
I got a call yesterday from the hiring manager. He left a 5 minute - no lie, I saved it - voice mail on my cell phone telling me the reason for the delay. He didn't want me to think it was because it was me, but rather they had some internal priorities to deal with. But that he now has been given the go-ahead to hire. So....he ultimately asked if I'd be available to come in for an informal chat with he and another PM.
Yesterday afternoon, I found myself swimming to my informal chat. I met with him and another PM on staff. I got a chance to ask all the hard questions of the PM that I was dying to ask, and his answers shocked me and made me want the job EVEN more.
As I was leaving, the hiring manager explained to me that he'd like to make a decision by Friday, but would like to see a few more resumes. He's comparing all the candidates to me and my skills. So I very slightly told him that he would not be disappointed by hiring me. I'd add value and I'd be a good fit.
All that being said, it sounds like its in the bag. Which is where the cynical side comes out. I really hesitate to be happy or excited about this job, because it seems every time I do, I get burned. With each ring of the phone, I'm sure its them saying, "Thanks, but we'll pass."
My heart keeps telling me that I did the best I could, and that its okay to be happy about the the possibility. While my brain, who for the first time in months, appears to have a louder voice than my heart, is yelling, "oh no you don't. You're not getting your hopes up to just be disappointed again. No way, Jose."
Oh the turmoil of multiple personalities.
So happy thoughts everyone. I need them (as does Ken so happy - job thoughts for us both)
What the hell am I talking about? I can hear you saying that now. I have bionic ears you know. Which, by the way, if I were ever to be granted a bionic option, ears would not be my first choice.
Anyhooooo...
The job front. So the Boeing job and the wireless job both well, sank. Which left me with my original job I so desired at Content Master. They had to postpone their hiring due to other internal hiring priorities. But now they're back and so am I.
I got a call yesterday from the hiring manager. He left a 5 minute - no lie, I saved it - voice mail on my cell phone telling me the reason for the delay. He didn't want me to think it was because it was me, but rather they had some internal priorities to deal with. But that he now has been given the go-ahead to hire. So....he ultimately asked if I'd be available to come in for an informal chat with he and another PM.
Yesterday afternoon, I found myself swimming to my informal chat. I met with him and another PM on staff. I got a chance to ask all the hard questions of the PM that I was dying to ask, and his answers shocked me and made me want the job EVEN more.
As I was leaving, the hiring manager explained to me that he'd like to make a decision by Friday, but would like to see a few more resumes. He's comparing all the candidates to me and my skills. So I very slightly told him that he would not be disappointed by hiring me. I'd add value and I'd be a good fit.
All that being said, it sounds like its in the bag. Which is where the cynical side comes out. I really hesitate to be happy or excited about this job, because it seems every time I do, I get burned. With each ring of the phone, I'm sure its them saying, "Thanks, but we'll pass."
My heart keeps telling me that I did the best I could, and that its okay to be happy about the the possibility. While my brain, who for the first time in months, appears to have a louder voice than my heart, is yelling, "oh no you don't. You're not getting your hopes up to just be disappointed again. No way, Jose."
Oh the turmoil of multiple personalities.
So happy thoughts everyone. I need them (as does Ken so happy - job thoughts for us both)
3 comments:
And I wonder where you get your cynisism? Is that a word? Just wondering apple.
Go, Jenn! Go, Jenn! It's your birthday! It's your birthday!
I wish you all the luck in the world, darlin'. I hope you get it.
FM - I don't even know you but I can see you doing the "birthday" dance...
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