I'm not afraid that things won't get better, but it feels like this has gone on forever...

How about a little Toad the Wet Sprocket this morning for your "stuck-in-your-noggin" song? No? Well it's stuck in mine.

Specifically that line in the song. See it's been 4 weeks (well I think this is the 5th week) of being hypnotized and I can say with certainty that it's changing something. More on that later.

This last Tuesday I met to have a new personal session recorded.  When I signed up for this I was told that your personal sessions are - wait for it - personalized. Meaning you can provide them things you'd like to work on. So I had myself a list of three things that I wanted added into my monthly session.

In no particular order they were:
1. Amp up the work out message
2. I'd like to stop thinking about food all the time (as in when I'm having breakfast I'm thinking about lunch and whether I'll have anything to eat. Strange fear of no food that has bubbled to the surface for me to work on).
3. Work on the emotional reasons I eat

They seem quite lofty and I was prepared for perhaps one or two to be included.

Instead, I got a woman who's voice grates on my last nerve. Ever known those people who's voice just sets you off? And while we had a conversation for about 15 minutes about how it was going and what I wanted included, NONE of it was included. Instead she literally read a script with this nagging, annoying voice.  And by read it I mean read it in a monotone, not very relaxing voice. In fact, I didn't even go under. Instead I found myself focusing on her voice and I ended up with a headache.

Yet, I decided to give it a try. And now having listened to it 3 times and not going under once, I'm making a call for a new recording.  I paid too much for this to NOT have a month of a useful recording.

In the meantime, I did also purchase an extra "recording" on a topic that I felt was appropriate. It's called "Keys to Speed Up Weight Loss". It has three keys...ready for them. They are mind blowing...

1. Eat healthy
2. Exercise
3. Portion Control

I know!! Your mind is blown!

The first time I listened to it, I did go under, and woke when they said "wake" and then they reiterated the three keys and I just giggled to myself.  Dah!

What I do know is working, however, is that I'm making healthier choices without much thought.  For example, my decision at Tin Lilly's to have grilled chicken and veggies instead of a starch.  I've also offered up to split meals with people - which I never do.

So do I think it's working? Yes.  And I am going to just keep going with it and try my very hardest to not over analyze it.  The fear I had of failure when this whole thing started is slowly being put aside and/or dealt with. 

I'm not afraid that things won't get better, they already have. And yes, this will go on forever, but I intend on it getting easier, not harder.