Happy Father's Day

These are the days that my brain perks up and floods me with memories. It's a special day for many to share their love for their Dad and show him how much he means to you. 

When you're a "fatherless" daughter on this day, all you have are memories. 

"Death leaves a heartache no one can heal, love leaves a memory no one can steal." - Richard Puz

I've really noticed that with the passing of loved ones, you really do only have memories. And your brain seems to only dish up the good ones. I'm well aware there are bad ones in there, but thankfully my brain is protecting me, I suppose, from the bad ones and giving me the opportunity to remember the strong, positive, loving memories. 

I miss Dad a lot. I miss what he represented in my life - a strong, firm, fair, loving hand guiding me to become a value to the world. He did this by tough love, support, providing advice - whether asked for or not, living by example, sharing his knowledge, sharing his love for food, and sharing his curiosity about the world that gave me the desire to travel. He was so much more than all these things, but these are the qualities and values I remember the most. 

He had his moments though. Don't we all? He could be so very stubborn (a quality he didn't appreciate in me). His argumentative side came out once in a while and there was no "winning" or even having an adult conversation when he was in that state (usually after several drinks). It was frustrating, at times, to try to get him to see the world the way it is and not have him demand it stay the was. He loved the old way of life and wasn't interested in change. 

Still, those "qualities" taught me a lot about myself. I often wonder if those traits annoyed me so much because I might have had/have some of them. That's a post for another time I suppose. 

Still, all the good and bad, I miss this man a lot. Every time I light up the BBQ or travel the world he's there with me. All the glorious memories I was able to make with him remain with me. And while life took him away from me, nothing can take these memories. 

Taken in 1978 in Iran. This photo was taken before he was my dad.
The smile was likely because he didn't have a teenage daughter to deal with yet.