I'm a Space Princess

When I left work on Tuesday afternoon, heading to vacation, it reminded me of the last days of school before the summer. The air seemed stale and full of promise of the months to come. I was so ready to be on vacation. I promised myself to not check email – though secretly I might just peek. I hopped in the Stang, blasted the music – as much as these old ears could handle, and off I went. I got about 15 miles away – almost home – and I realized I left my wallet at work. Typical. Turn around and head back.

I had done most my packing the day before so I really didn’t have anything to do except clean the apartment slightly since the parental units would be staying there over the weekend. If Pookie wasn’t going to be traumatized enough by me being gone, he was going to have two standard poodles as housemates for the weekend.

Up at the butt crack of before dawn and off to the airport. The airport was absolutely packed. I couldn’t believe how many people were there. I knew it might be busy, but not packed. I had no worries though had plenty of time to get through security (and for the record, why are people so stupid? I mean really. You’re standing in line. The recording is looping telling you to take you freakin shoes off – but noooo there’s always a couple of people who seemed surprised that they have to take their shoes off. ) Through security and off to Bucky’s for coffee.

The flight to Houston was uneventful. I slept. Steppin Out 2 was the movie and I figured I could miss that. But the flight from Houston to Orlando was quite eventful. I got to sit in first class. This young Indian family wanted to sit together so the husband asked if I wanted his seat instead. I was feeling oddly generous so I said sure. Then he said it was in first class…Um HELL Yah I’ll switch with ya. I got water in a GLASS with ice, a free bloody mary, warm towelette, and a wide seat for my derriere. Too bad it was the short leg of the trip, but I’m not complaining.

I got down to baggage claim and for all of you who made fun of my pink with white polka dots suitcase, let me just say, I recognized it from three carousels down! Waiting for SLSIL and then we’re off. Orlando will never be the same.

That was yesterday. Today is , well today. Thursday. It's sunny and 91 outside as I sit poolside and write this blog. Beer in hand (well not in hand because I can't type then - but not far from the hand...ooo hold please...gotta take a sip)

Anyhow, SLSIL and I got up this morning, not too early I might add, and headed east to the Kennedy Space Center. Oh. My. God is that the coolest place on earth. We took the Nasa Up Close tour, which took us all over. We got to see both shuttle - or sorry they call them orbiters - launching pads, the big ass building they put the rockets and shuttles together in, and of course, critters. Not that Nasa is special for critters, but the space center sits on a wildlife refuge. Very cool. On our way out we saw two gators - much to SLSIL's concern. She's not a fan of the gators. Then we saw a turtle, two or three eagles, and a couple of mating ugly ass bugs. Bug P*rn oh goody. And before you ask, yes I did add to my pink collection by purchasing the pink Space Princess Travel mug. I've been thinking about buying a travel mug anyhow to do my part with saving the environment - I just needed to find the right one...and so I have.

The tour through the center was especially cool because there's a shuttle launch for this Saturday. Sadly no tickets in my price range are available and as far as I can tell I'm not a VIP. Bummer. We couldn't see the actual shuttle on the pad because it's being prepped, but you can see the big ass gas tank.

This is the big ass building (BAB) below [BTW NASA is FULL of acronyms. I thought Geeksoft was bad. I now know where they learned it from]. Just to put it in perspective, each star on the flag is 6 feet wide. And I'm not sure it'll come out in the blog, but in the middle section near the NASA logo you can see a straight line - if you look real close you might be able to see two fools up there painting.

Tomorrow we're "shopping" and having lunch with some old family friends of ours. I can't wait to see them, it's been years. Well, the Tiki Bar is calling me back to drink more beer, so I'm going to sign out for now.

One and one is sometimes eleven

It seems a lifetime since I last wrote. I was most certainly in a funk and writing helped me get out of it. Wednesday and Thursday I worked a total of 30 hours, by Friday I was indeed fried. But I have lived to tell the tale. I did finally get some positive feedback, though not from who I expected, but none the less it felt good to know I wasn't in it alone. And thanks to everyone who passed on their words of encouragement, it helped.

I got home Friday around 2:30 and was so tired I wasn't sure how I was to possibly walk 15 miles. This weekend was our "test" in that we wanted to do 15 miles back to back. After looking at google pedometer we found it was more likely 12 for Friday. Perfect. Bigbro walked from his work and so by the time he met us he'd already gone 10 miles. It was sunny with the threat of overcast and maybe rain. But off we went. I took my 5 hour energy in my water - so as to not get all weird like I did the first time I took it. So despite the fact I wanted to do nothing but nap, I strapped on my shoes and I was off.

About 10 minutes into it the rain started. It wasn't a down pour, but a constant rain. It was miserable. We debated on calling BigBro's wifeepoo to pick us up, but by the time we thought that we figured we only had about 4 miles left. I was feeling surprisingly well considering the week I had. And then...

About 2 miles out I hit the wall. That invisible "i can't go any further" wall. BigBro gave us two options at that point. We could either take this ENORMOUS hill or walk 14 more blocks on flat land. Clearly I was delusional because I suggested the hill. At some point BigBro said (though as I understand it now he said it BEFORE we took off I just either ignored it or missed it) that the hill was about 12 blocks long. erm, what? Ugh. The first part of this hill was straight up. Shut up I know hills are generally straight up, but I mean STRAIGHT up...it felt like climbing a ladder. (Drama queen alert) - I thought I was going to die. But alas, I got to the top and that good old feeling of accomplishment greeted me. It was all down hill from there. My right foot was hurting like crazy. The start of that blasted ball of my foot blister. I had a bad feeling about being able to get up and walk again on Saturday.

So Saturday morning I tried to "fix" it by putting puffy moleskin on both balls. I mean both balls of my feet you pervert. But even then I wasn't sure. It hurt. And we all know my threshold of pain is like - well it doesn't exist. I'll admit it. I'm a baby.

Got to BigBro's house, we decided on a route and we were off. Coffee in hand, 5 hour energy in my water and I was ready. The foot was hurting. About 2 miles we came across a Joe's sporting good store, so we decided we should go in and get some medical tape and maybe something to help cushion my foot. And wouldn't you know it, they had PINK prewrap and pink medical tape. Well, I couldn't not get pink. So now I have some very cool pink tape to go with all the other pink items I've collected in the past year.

BigBro got out his second skin, gause and bandaids. We cushioned up the right foot and wrapped it in perty pink tape and we were off. It felt good really. The weird thing is if you stop, the first 5 steps when you start again hurt like hell. But then it's like it goes numb or something, but its fine. So we walked on.

At a certain point we hit a park in Seattle. We were going to walk to the water and come back up, about another mile on our trek. I decided to stay at the top and rest the foot and stretch a bit. BigBro and Blueberry were off. By the time they got back, I was glad I didn't bother. They were both panting as the hike back up was quite the hike. Finally, I made a good solid decision that I was sure would save my foot.

We turned to head home. The sun was high in the sky by this point and it was warm, but a nice warm. Around 70 which in my opinion is perfect to walk in. A heck of a lot better than Friday night's rain walk. At this point though my left foot was starting to be vocal about all the attention the right foot was getting. I decided to ignore it and just keep on. Maybe not the best decision, but I just wanted to get home.

As we headed up this hill, there on the horizon we saw it. 7-11....ahhhh, our hot dog break. Thank god. Now generally speaking our hot dog breaks are quick. I mean after all we are stopping at a convenience store who's entire purpose is for people to get in and out pretty quick. This 7-11 apparently didn't get that memo. My. god. It took us 20 minutes I swear to get our dogs, and get out of there. The clerk was no where to be found when we got in. Several other "characters" were in the store with us. We weren't exactly in a great part of town and we got to experience all the "winners" from that area. Drunk man 1 decided to just walk out with his beer since the clerk was no where around. As he left two meth girls walked in on a "munchy" break. Still no clerk. I was peaking into the back rooms and finally she came out of the bathroom. It was pretty clear pretty quick that she wasn't playing with a full deck and she confirmed it when she was trying to ring Blue up for her hot dog. Bigbro and I gave up waiting for the clerk so we went and decorated our dogs and just stood in the back eating them. We were almost done before Blue got back and we just stood and watched the scene of crazy that was in the store. Then BigBro and I had to check out - my god. The clerk couldn't figure out how to ring bro's dogs up since they were a two-fer. He got a deal on it too...I made mine relatively simple for her, but still. So off we went.

In the end I did 11 Friday night and 11 on Saturday. Bigbro and Blue did a bit more since they walked to the park and back. It was a good test, and I really need to figure out what to do about my feet. It sucks really because the legs don't hurt, and aren't sore...so if I can figure out the feet I'd be good to go.

I'm finally sitting and resting. I was in bed by 9pm last night and was out with no effort. I had to get my energy back since today was going to be a full one too. But in a good way. Picking up TheNiece for a pedicure and lunch. I won't be getting an "official" pedicure, but a soak and a massage...which is fine by me.

And as if my life isn't already busy, but I leave for Orlando on Wednesday for a much needed vacation. SLSIL will be meeting me - Yay - and we'll be getting into some trouble. Then I have to be at a tradeshow for 5 days. All in all it will put me behind at work, but I'll be where its warm and not in Seattle.

Just How Bad Can it get?

I'm not sure yet, but I'll let you know.

I'm feeling, of late, like a beaten down, stomped on, abused little kitten. "They" say - whomever "they" are - that when you're down you only have up to go. I'm not 100% sure about that, but am trying to hold out hope.

It seems that life is a constant ebb and flow of good times and bad times. Any time now I can see the good times. Really, any time now...a.n.y.t.i.m.e! I'm still waiting.

I'm in a situation where even when I think I'm doing my best and trying to do my best, that inevitably a negative is found in my performance. I feel like no matter what I do, nothing I do will ever be good enough or meet the extraordinary expectations that appear to be just set high enough for me to not reach. I can't help but wonder, what it would feel like to get a "good job" once in a while? What does that "approval" feel like?

I am, generally, the first to admit when I need to grow. When feedback is given to me, I generally take it seriously and make strides to "fix" whatever it is that appears to be broken. It's one of the most redeeming qualities that I happen to like about myself. But being forced to change the way you do things, and knowing that you're under a microscope while you make those changes, just lends to making mistakes. The constant walking on egg shells and constantly having to prove myself is not something I do well. And what may have ordinarily been a "mistake" is taken out of context and blown up to appear that you are incompetent. I'm not I swear! I used to think that I was good at what I did and now am questioning it. I hate that. I hate that. I mean, let me learn. Let me grow and let me make mistakes and look at them in context to what I've done well.

And what about my successes? Do they mean nothing? Do they get swept under a carpet and not mentioned?

I will be the first to admit I am far from perfect. But now I'm wondering if I'm ever going to be close to acceptable.

I probably shouldn't post this, but it's after 9pm and I'm just leaving work and frankly I just don't care right now.

And don't worry about me. I'll come out the other end and be fine. By the time most of you read this I will have gotten some sleep, have had a 5 freakin A.M. con call, and moved on hopefully. I'm just feeling beaten to a pulp right now and find the only way to feel better is to write about it. Though if anyone has any advice on how to "impress" and "convince" others of my greatness, please email me - or post to the blog.

To lift my spirits though, I peaked to see who won American Idol. I've been accused lately of being a closet idol watcher. I'm not, I swear, but it just so happens that a Mr. Hotty McSexyson is a contestant...and boy can he ever sing. And thankfully to some very serious voting that went on over there yonder in a small gardenish state, Mr. McSexyson won. Thanks Jersey!

Pet Peevesapalooza

I have several pet peeves. I don't mean to, but people in today's world just make it so easy to have them. And really they're not so much as "peeves" as "people really piss me off."

I'm in training for two days. Thrilling, overly exhilarating Financial Fundamentals for non financial minded managers...or something like that. It's learning how to speak accountant and finance. See, our CEO is an accountant and I need to learn how to speak his language. He and I are definitely same planet / different worlds sorta thing.

It's been my experience that many of the "professional" training courses I've participated in are full of people who have little, to no understanding of consideration towards the other participants. For example, pet peeve # 14758.

Tardiness. I get so annoyed when people come into a class late. First and foremost, you know what time the class starts. You get it in your registration brochure AND the registration confirmation AND the ticket stub thingy you have to bring with you to paid. Yet, people still show up late. What is that all about? I'm perpetually early. It's both a curse and a blessing. I just think that if someone is waiting on me, I should respect them enough to be on time. And furthermore, when you're excused for a break, and the instructor says "let's be back by a quarter after." She doesn't mean half past! I'm just sayin'. These people are harshing my mellow.

Pet Peeve #78946

Separate conversations while the instructor is instructing. I can understanding asking, "what'd she say?" Or "what page?" But full on conversations? Come on! You - over there in the cute pink skirt! Shut the heck up! You're voice carries and no one cares about your tooth pain. I'm just sayin'.

Pet Peeve #89765 (Yes that means I have over eighty-nine thousand pet peeves. Not really. I'm really quite nice, at times. I just have a low tolerance for people who don't respect others around them). ahem.

Right, so back to my pet peeve. Asking questions just for the sake of hearing your own voice. Um yah, like that question about personal expenses has any relevance on our current topic of depreciation.

So how exactly do so many people become so inconsiderate? I just gotta know.

Oh, and when the instructor says, "Please turn off your cell phones and pagers." she's talking to you stinky boy in row 3.

ahhh, now that that's off my chest.

I had a weird random thing happen this morning. Actually wasn't so much that it "happened", but that I noticed it. There was an alarmingly large amount of white cars on the road today. As I drove in to the Emerald City I noticed that every car around me and in my line of sight was white. What does that mean I wonder? An omen? Or more likely I was in some vortex or something that caused the color in all vehicles to disappear so my baby could appear to be so beautiful and Wow'ing.

Right. Moving on...

I got to downtown early this morning because I had to take a presales call before the class. I parked several blocks away to 1) save on parking and 2) get in some exercise. As I walked out of the very conveniently located Starbucks right by where I parked that smell hit me. The smell I think every big city has in the early morning. That smell of energy building. It's fresh, but yet you can feel it. Oh man, I love that time of morning in the big city (well, Seattle).

I was shocked at how fast today went. I was sure sitting through AccountANT speak was going to just about kill me. My process orientated mind loved how exact accounting is. I mean really, it's the answer to just about any question you might have about a company. But the mathy side just baffles me sometimes. But alas, the light bulb went on. Did you see it? A bright light coming from the North? That was me getting it! Finally! That double entry thing - makes perfect sense. It's really yin/yang. Every action has a reaction.

And with that, I'm gonna become a CPA. Okay, not really. But I almost had ya didn't I? Stop laughing, I could be a CPA. I might, after all, need a career change here very soon.

And finally, the Photo Safari of the weekend. I've really saved the best rambling for last. Sunday was a beautiful day. PhotoGods met up and walked through the botanical gardens snapping contest winning photos right and left. I had one personal favorite.

quad, two-pump vanilla, one and one-quarter pump sugar free hazel nut, latte with 1/2 soy, 1/2 nonfat, extra hot, with three ice cubes

Right! I'm not making that up by the way. My drink? Grande Vanilla American with Xtra room. Simple, to the point, and I don't have to take a breath while ordering. The drink in the title? Ordered at a local Starbucks by a crazy, one and one quarter full deck player customer. I had to ask the barista to write it down for me because there was no way I'd remember all those adjectives.

I've been reading a book about Starbucks of late called The Starbucks Experience. The book is written as a "business" book to explain why Starbucks, as a company, is so successful. The book states that Starbuck's success is primarily on the way the treat their "partners" (employees). The executives live the vision, and the partners see that and live the vision too. What a concept! Say what you will about Starbucks, but their business practices with their partners is quite revolutionary. Made me go out to their website to see if they have any project management openings. What? The partners get ONE FREE pound of coffee a week!

Here are some interesting facts about the company. You can likely find a Starbucks within 5 miles of your home (that's assuming you are living in an city/town - the small town livers need not apply). If you had invested $10,000 in Starbucks in 1992, your investment would be worth approximately $650,000 today! Starbucks stock rose 5,000%! AND, today Starbucks opens five new stores a day! I know most of you are like, 'Dah', but really think about that. 5 stores a day! Think about the impact that has on the company, the communities, the world, and more importantly me. I mean, that means no matter where I travel, I can find a Starbucks.

In Seattle, there seems to be a almost dislike for Starbucks by some. It's a huge company who has taken over the streets of Seattle. We have several small coffee shops that offer some great coffee and a great atmosphere. I don't think there's anything wrong with those shops either. In fact, I find myself on a regular basis sitting at one, but it offers me a different experience. When I go to one of those coffee shops I'm never really sure what my coffee is going to be like. Starbucks, to me, is consistent. I can almost guarantee that if I go into any store and order my Grande Vanilla Americano with Xtra room, I'll get the same thing I got yesterday at a different store.

"My" Starbucks, not only knows my drink when I step to the counter, they know I have a registered Starbucks card, they know I am walking in the 3-day and ask how it's going, they know that on Fridays I may be tempted to buy a Top Pot donut, and they know that there's at least a 50% chance I'll be back in the afternoon. And almost on a regular basis, I get an extra shot in the morning (which is 4 shots in my Americano - which PMDude LOVES when that happens because that makes me - well more fun.)

Yesterday was a beautiful day here. A day in which I almost died. Okay, maybe not, but it sure felt that way. I taught myself a very valuable lesson yesterday. It's one of those things you "know" but for some reason you don't appreciate until you're in a learning situation and you are forced to get it. Yah, that was me yesterday.

BigBro, Blue and I took off for a 16 mile walk yesterday at 6:30AM. As we left the apartment it was already almost 60 degrees. It was going to be a hot one. In about 7 miles I hadn't even drank 24 oz of water. In heat. I felt like crap. I couldn't even fathom walking another step. Thankfully, on the horizon was a Starbucks (Yay). I sat and drank a 20 oz water, bought another bottle (I dropped my bottle of water in the toilet - don't ask), filled it with zip fiz, changed the socks and rested for about 20 minutes. I felt better. But as we walked on, again, I barely drank. It was so hot, small breeze only every now and then, that I should have been chugging water. I was clearly dehydrated. At a certain point, I bid farewell to BigBro and Blue - I zigged to the right and they went on to finish the walk. I managed to find my way home. Stopping twice to rest in less than a half mile from my apartment. I was dying. I was panting when walking on flat ground. I had no water with me since I had chugged the rest of my 24 oz bottle I had filled up at Starbucks 6 miles back. I was proving a point to myself and I gotta tell ya, there must be a better way.

I got home, somehow, chugged two more 20oz of water sat on the floor and panted and slowly cooled down. Between the sun and lack of water, I was sure that I would die right there and ten on my cat fur covered carpet. Lesson Learned: MUST. DRINK. WATER. I quite frankly felt like a loser to some extent because my own stupidity got in the way of me training, but I've learned and will do what I need to in order for this to NOT happen again. Blue and BigBro ended up going 17 total and I ended with 15 total (give or take).

Today it's another beautiful day, cooler, but beautiful. Today is another Photo Safari with the PhotoGods. We're heading to the Bellevue Botanical Gardens for flower shots...Yay! My favorite! Oh, but have to stop at Starbucks on my way though, so I'd better get going.

Roll the windows down, turn the radio up, let the wind blow through my hair

It's summer here in the great northwest. At least for today, tomorrow and possibly Saturday. It's hard to say really, our weather men are 98% wrong it seems. Tomorrow they say mid 80s! WHOA! Too bad I'll be at work. Though I might appreciate the air condition office building.

See that's just like us Seattle types. We complain when it rains. Complain when it's sunny and complain when it's both. We're never satisfied. I blame Geeksoft! No reason in particular. I just do.

The sunny weather brings every freak known to man out. People roll their windows down and they assume I need to hear their stupid music. Puleeze! I want to hear my music that's blaring with MY windows down.

I have a bone to pick with you dear readers. Not a single one of you offered up to buy that Mustang for me OR the Zune. What gives? Here I'm all nice to you by writing and sharing my most inner most secrets and thoughts. Sheesh! The nerve!

This week was officially "Pamper Jenn" week (which is why I assumed I'd come home to find a Warrior Mustang in my driveway!). I got a pedicure (or a nice foot torture and pretty paint on the toes), got the hair cut and colored and finally today was a massage by Chicken Lady.

In other fine news of the day, The Yank gets a big YOU ROCK! He gave me the snazzy code for the honor roll of my donors. I'm trying to fix it to remove last names and all so never fear you'll true identity will be safe with me..some day! Anyhow, Yank...thanks - hey that rhymes. "Stop rhyming and I mean it." "Anyone want a peanut?"

Saturday will be another long walk. 16 miles is the goal. We have chicken out points where we (read: I) can choose to go back and not suffer the 16 miles. I'm game though. In fact, I'm more than game. Last Saturday stunk the big one and so I feel like I owe it to myself to really focus. Did a quicky 5 miles yesterday, but haven't been able to get any walking in the rest of the week. I have been able to get in some cross training so Yah me. Just for that I think I should get to work from home tomorrow! As if.

On the work front, I got a big thumbs up for a Boring Unfortunate Meeting and my attention to my projects. Yay me - two! I got some good feedback from appropriate people. But still other appropriate people could not find it to actually say "good job" but instead found "fault" in what I should have done. Argh!

Shooting at the walls of heartache... Bang! Bang! I am a warrior... In Pink!

No not for donations. That I have covered. I need money so I can buy this.

CLICK ME TO SEE WHAT I NEED TO BUY!!!

What? You don't think I'm serious, do ya? I'm so serious. My BigBro sent this to me though fearful I'd get in my current beautiful stang and drive to the local Ford dealer and trade my baby in. And don't think for a minute I didn't consider at least calling to see how much. I mean really! This is AWESOME.

I see you by the way. I can see you all rolling your eyes. I gotta tell ya, if Ford were fronting more than just $250 for each purchase, I'd seriously consider it. But then I'd need a second and third job to pay for a new car.

OH and OMG I can get a WARRIOR ZUNE! ARGH!!! BigBro you. Are. Evil! Anyone got a spare $250 they can give me? Come one! It's for a good cause. If you want to donate a ZUNE to my personal growth - I mean really, doesn't a girl need a zune to walk with?, I'd be glad to send you my home address for shipping purposes. Just let me know, k? MomUnit? Got some extra cash in your couch cushions?

Okay, so I decided to keep myself somewhat limited and only ordered a t-shirt, or two or three!

Moving on to other pink related news. The much awaited announcement of my most recent pink purchase. Wouldn't it be awesome if it was the Mustang? At least it is something that can travel.
No need to adjust your computer monitor. Or rub your eyes in disbelief. It is in fact a pink with polka dots suitcase. The upside, besides all it's pinkness, is that I can almost guarantee I'd see it instantly when it comes out of the baggage claim. And if anyone DARES walk off with it I'd see it. Yah, sure it might get dirty, but dirty pink is still pink.

I am starting to think I have a sickness. Pink Fever! I wonder if its contagious! DOH better go wash your hands. Now if you'll excuse me, I need to go drool over a pink mustang. Oh shoosh, you know you want too to. Go ahead. I give you permission.

Mom, I love you more than you love me because you have only loved me for a part of your life and I have loved you for all of mine.

HAPPY MOM'S DAY MOM!!!!

I could go on and on why I cherish my mom. Many of my stories aren't any different than most women who are fortunate enough to have their best friend be their mom. ( I can guarantee she tears up as she reads that last line.) My mom knows me better than anyone else and has always been quick with a thump on the head to straighten up. She's just as quick with an "atta girl" when it applied.

I'll be your shoulder when you need someone to lean on.
Be your shelter. When you need someone to see you through.
I'll be there to carry you. I'll be there.
I'll be the rock that will be strong for you.
The one that will hold on to you.
When you feel that rain falling down.
When there's nobody else around. I'll be.

When I think back to the early years of my life I was always a momma's girl. I have several cherished memories of watching my mom be the strong, never bending woman during times you were sure she'd falter. I can remember, specifically, a day in college when I decided it was okay to be like her.

I look at my life now and see so many similarities. As much as I tried to not be like her - because face it we all want to be unique - the truth is I am her. We not only look a bit a like (ya think?) but I see myself as a fighter, a woman who will not be held back or held down. Push me, kick me, try to hold me under the water and see me fail, and I will prove you wrong. That was my mom. She battled in the land of the good old boys at Boeing to be a manager and try to make a difference in the company. A career woman because she had to be. A mom because she wanted to be. Lubya mom. (BTW for those of you who like to email me because I've spelled something wrong...that is an inside joke with my mom and me and so please don't email me to tell me I spelled luv ya wrong.)

And...in other news. The weekend walk was 14 miles. We took off from BigBro's house at 7am and walked the Burke Gilman trail to the University of Washington. Up over this BIG hill in the U district, down the back side and over to Greenlake,then back to BigBro's. I struggled yesterday. At one point, I wanted to just sit on the curve and not move for 3 days. I just didn't want to go on. I was done. My self speak was all about wondering what the hell I was doing thinking I could walk 60 miles. It was a stupid idea to ever think, and I should just quit now! Yah, great self speak huh? But somehow I managed to put one foot in front of the other and we made it home. Once home I was very glad I was out walking, but still. I was one tired puppy.

So where am I with my adventure? I'm over $3000 ($3,125) in donations (see below for the most recent shout outs), and yesterday put me over 200 training miles (210 to be exact). Just looking at those two numbers and I see why I'm doing this.

Big HUGE shout out to Susan and Felicia for your donations. I'm always amazed that people are generous even when they don't know you. Thank you again.

And MOMUNIT...wow...thank you for your extremely generous donation. I knew you said you'd donate with a hefty amount, but holy cow...thanks.

If anyone knows how I can get the roll call from my 3day site onto this blog, please let me know! I think it would be kick ass to have here.

And with that...Jenn over and out.

PS I bought another pink item that I'll blog about later. But suffice it to say, everyone of whom I've either told or have seen it have given me the "you've got to be kidding me." look.

Hello? Hello out there! Anyone there?

Yah I bet that's what some of you are saying. My deepest apologies for taking such a break from writing. It wasn't intentional, I just lost track of time.

Last week wasn't such a great week at work, which could account for my lack of writing. Let's just say that things have been said. Thoughts have been processed. Decisions need to be made.

The ParentalUnits were here this weekend after a lovely extended cruise in which they took great joy in spending my inheritance. And all I got from it was a lousy t-shirt...oh wait, I didn't even get that! No matter. It was good to see them again and glad they are out gallivanting around the globe in their retirement.

I have a few more shout outs to make! I'm officially half way + a couple hundred to my $5,000 goal. WHOA! You all rock! Every single one of you who's donated. But more importantly the following get their very own shout outs!

OPSTADS OF THE LAKE! THANK YOU FOR YOUR GENEROUS DONATION!

MR. VOLLEYBALL AND THE DANE: WOW! THAT'S ALL I CAN SAY. WOW. MR. VOLLEYBALL WE'VE BEEN FRIENDS FOR A LONG LONG LONG TIME AND I'M SO VERY FORTUNATE TO HAVE YOU AS A FRIEND. THANK YOU FOR YOUR DONATION!

NEVADA TURTLE'S COMPADRES: I'M ALWAYS SHOCKED THAT PEOPLE WHO DON'T EVEN KNOW ME DONATE TO SUCH A FANTASTIC CAUSE. THANK YOU FOR YOUR SUPPORT AND DONATION.

TIT: YES THAT'S RIGHT! I REMEMBER BACK IN HIGH SCHOOL WHEN WE GOT OUR INITIALS ON OUR LETTERMAN JACKETS AND YOURS CAME BACK T.I.T. THANK YOU FOR YOUR DONATION!

Whew! My cup runneth over!

I made a sentimental leap this weekend that I'd like to share. I've been trying to think of a way to carry everyone who's offered support to me through donations with me during the walk. I've decided that I'm going to write everyone's name on a t-shirt and wear it. BigBro suggested that I offer up certain locations to the highest bidder. It seems odd to think about pimping certain anatomyout for a cause, but if it means big money, why not!

Last weekend BigBro, Blue and I walked 10 miles. That put me at 190 training miles. Then the 5 BigBro and I did tonight makes me teetering on hitting the 200 mark. Our big 15/15 back to back walk is scheduled for Memorial Day weekend. We'll walk 15 Friday night and 15 Saturday. Sunday I'll be dead. Monday I might be okay, though TBD.

Oh and I'm heading south. That's right, heading to Orlando, FL for a wee bit of vacation and then a conference. I leave the end of May for the vacation part. Any suggestions on what to do there besides Disney and Kennedy Space Center would be most welcome. St. Louis Sister-In-Law will be joining me for our mini-break - so look out Orlando! I could care less about Disney. We have a plan to see the space center, so I need something more. Shopping of course will be on the agenda...that's a given with SLSIL.

So for not...toodles! Gotta get some more work done.

Pookie has Friends

We've had some new "neighbors" move into my back yard. They're quite cute I must say. I don't think they'll eat much, and I'm sure they won't bother the PookMan.

I need to name them. Any suggestions?

I'm the walkingest girl around. She who limps is still walking!

Let me first start by saying, I am feeling an enormous sense of satisfaction. Emotionally I feel GGRRRReat!

Physically, not so much.

What started as a nice casual 15 mile walk, turned into a rather painful 18 mile death march. Okay, maybe "death march" is a little dramatic. But just barely.

Oh, did you want to go back and read that? Yes, I said 18 miles. BigBro said to me after the walk and after we had "stretched" for a couple of minutes, that I was walking like he was after the 60 miles. Which only means to me I have a long way to go. I'm complete stoked that I was pushed to do it (note I didn't say I pushed myself - I'm not good at that), but think perhaps I did too much too soon.

Let me start at the beginning and while I can feel my fingers.

Blueberry and I started our adventure at O'dark O'clock (6AM for those who want to know) - stopped at Starbuck's - of course - and headed to meet BigBro at his house. Our "plan" was to walk with the Warming Hut Hotties who was a team BigBro had done training walks with last year. According to their email they were doing a 7 mile walk starting at Greenlake. Our "plan" was to take off from BigBro's house, walk to Greenlake (4 miles he said), walk with the Hotties for 7, take a quick little break and change our socks, then head home (4 miles).

Sounds easy enough. BigBro did give us the option of just meeting at Greenlank and only doing 11. Blue and I decided to push ourselves and try the 15. Plus BigBro promised the Hotties stop on a very regular basis and therefore we'd have plenty of resting opportunities.

So, off we went. It was a perfectly crisp morning in Seattle. The sun was already up and getting ready to warm the earth and us. It was a nice time to be out and about. The first part of the walk was, you guessed it, up hill. Why? Why does he torment me so? I know he's trying to get me in shape for 60 miles, but my god. This hill went on and on and on and on...and on. I may be exaggerating slightly, but it felt like 50 miles of up hill.

Cresting the hill and down into the "valley" to Greenlake. Stopping every so briefly at Starbucks for a potty break and water filler upper station. We still have a half mile or so to meet the Hotties.

Meeting the Hotties was a blast. Very energetic, fun loving team. All shapes and sizes showed up for this "7mile" walk. They are an extremely organized team and has a team leader who knows her stuff. Off we went.

Our first stop was a stretching stop, then up the alleged 64th Monster Hill. I had already walked up a couple of monster hills, so I was sure I was well ahead of this lot who had just started training. Pulling out my billy goat personality, up we went. I almost got light headed from the massive elevation change that took place, but I survived (again, maybe a little over exaggeration - maybe). The hill was broken into two long blocks. I marched up the first block at full speed, determined to not be the caboose of the bunch. Hitting the half way point, I couldn't breaths and decided being the caboose wasn't such a bad idea. One foot in front of the other, I made the top. Ahhh, a resting point, a Starbucks.

Catching my breath we stood out front and I realized I had been here before. This was the Starbucks near the Italian restaurant we had celebrated Blueberry's and The Groom of the Newlyweds birthday two years prior. Wait? What? I'm there! How'd I get there? Seemed to me it was miles away from Greenlake.

We look so fresh don't we? By this time we had walked just about 5 I think. I had no idea I'd be dead in 4 hours! I'm the cute one on the right - Blueberry and BigBro make up the rest of the photo.

A 15 minute stop there, and off we went. I noticed suddenly, (since I wasn't really paying attention to where we were going because we had a leader who was, well, leading) that we were in Ballard. What? Now for those of you who aren't from around here, Ballard seems like 50 miles away from Greenlake, when it's only like maybe 4 or so, but when you drive the traffic makes it seem longer. We were at a Safeway, "resting" and I kept thinking, "I've walked from Lake City (where BigBro lives) to BALLARD!" Whodathunk!

But we walked on. Next thing I know we're stopping at one of my favorite Starbucks in Freemont! Again, I'm like, "What? Freemont? That's like 40 minutes driving from Ballard." Well, it feels like it. I'm constantly stunned at how close things really are.

Our pedometers were, again, all different. We tried to fix mine so my stride was closer to Blueberrie's and BigBro's but it didn't reset like we had thought. Either was we were off again. This particular stop at Starbuck's was too long in my opinion and I was starting to cool down too much and freeze up.

Let's where was I? OH yes, Freemont. I suddenly realized that we were in a "bowl". We had come down a good size hill into Ballard, which only meant one thing. We had to hike our way out. Oh Lord! Turning left onto Wallingford Ave, BigBro says to me, "We have to get to 45th".

WHAT?

Holy Crap. How was I going to do this. I was already dead tired, now you want me to hike a half mile up hill? Right! One foot in front of the other. Breath! Breath!

BigBro stayed back with me and we chatted our way up the hill - cancel that - he chatted. I was having a hard time catching my breath let alone talk. Then before I knew it, we were at the top of the hill at a QFC! We were almost there.

Finally, we made our way back to Greenlake. BigBro had told Blue and I to bring a change of socks since at/about 10 miles you should change your socks. We took the shoes and socks off and let the cool air pass by our warm, sweaty tooties. Man, it felt soooo good. I never would have thought just switching socks would make such a difference, but it sure did. I moleskinned up as I was showing signs of blisters on the bottom of BOTH my feet. The left foot was more swollen and sore than the right for a change.

But we marched on. I was very tempted to let BigBro and Blue to head home and come back to get me. I'd just sit in the sun at Starbucks and wait. But now, I decided to be a big girl and walk with him. Hindsight, it might have been too much.

Thankfully, home meant only one relatively small hill in the beginning, and two relatively small hills to the house. Plus I could see the Stang at that point, so I knew I'd survive.

Though at a certain point, BigBro mentions there's a 7-11 on the way home, and we KNEW Hot Dogs could be found at 7-11. Oh glory day.

By this time we had been walking for 6 hours and only had a few snacks here and there. Then, there in the distance, I could see the sign. The beautifully, welcoming, recognizable sign for 7-11. It was heaven.


It's possible our theme for this adventure to walk 60 miles will be Starbucks and Hot Dogs. But OMG did it taste good.

But like I said, we made it home and ultimately, I made it home. It was a b*tch to drive a standard car when the balls of your feet are so sore that just thinking about touching them almost brings tears.

I'm sure you are all too aware that I don't do pain very well. And when it's the bottom of your feet, it's impossible to not hurt. I drugged up when I got home, took a shower, then sat my butt on the couch and soaked the tootsies (iced the left foot first as per directions from Dr. BigBro!)

The muscle pain I don't mind so much. Did you know your butt is actually a muscle? I had no idea. (kidding). The list of pains: My right hip muscle/butt muscle ached like the dickens. The back of my left knee had a crampy sore feeling to it. Both feet were sore to touch. Neck hurts due to looking down as I walk.

Oh did I mention that the Hotties walk was 8 miles, and it was closer to 5 both ways from and to BigBro's house? Yah! Do the math! Blueberrie's pedometer said 20+ miles. My pedometer said 17+. BigBro's said almost 5 because he reset it at Starbucks in Greenlake. So averaging it out and knowing what the Hotties said, we figured 18 miles. And just for the record, I take about 2900 steps per mile. That means I went around 52,000 steps.

OH.
MY.
God.

Today I feel very tired. Feet still sore as all get out. Walking is a challenge to be sure. If I could find a way to not walk on the balls of my feet I'd be fine. All the while I've been thinking, if this is what I feel like after 18 ... what will 20+ feel like. Because I tell you what? There is NO WAY in hell that I could be out walking today. I only hope that in the next 20 weeks I can build up enough endurance to not feel like this.

Pay It Forward!

Not only one of my favorite movies, but I keep it in mind when good things happen to me. Not often, but every now and then people surprise me. Today was one of those days.

First, on my way to work there was a stalled car on an off ramp blocking one of the lanes. Everyone around me was honking and going around the dead car. Not a soul bothered to call the highway patrol. So once I got around it, I called 911. Pleasant voice on the other end thanked me for reporting it and told me that too few people don't call stalled cars in and ultimately they get called for an accident! So there! I saved someone from an accident.

I parked the car and went into Starbucks (yes I was driving and talking at the same time..even funnier to me is that I was driving and talking to the highway patrol who thinks we should drive and talk). In Starbucks, there was a woman and her husband in front of me. I'm very used to standing in line at Starbucks and rarely feel that the person in front is "taking too long." This woman and her husband were buying a Starbucks gift card. Honestly, it didn't take her any longer than normal. She walks away and it's my turn to order. The clerk says, "the usual?" My response, "er um yes!" Though I'm thinking that perhaps I frequent this Starbucks too often if I 1 ) now have a usual and 2) they know it. Then the clerk proceeds to tell me that the woman in front of me paid for my coffee becaus they took too long.

I thanked the woman and her husband and told her it wasn't really necessary. And as she walked away she said, "Happy Friday!"

So now I feel like I need to Pay It Forward. Who can I be nice to?

Skippy? Yah right, like that's going to happen.

Sales in general - erm...no.

PMDude - he's already on the "be nice to" list for his donation

Blueberry? Won't see her until tomorrow and I'm not sure the "be nice" feeling will last that long

(Side bar: Not to mention we'll be attempting 15 miles tomorrow! Oh and it's going to be in the 70's. Remember last weekend? Snow! Go Figure)


The MomUnit? Can't be nice to her, she's floating in the pacific somewhere spending my inheritance.

Who then?

Act II: Scene 7: Jenn loses her mind

I feel so loved. Thank you to everyone of my avid readers who have sent me an email asking if I was okay because I've not blogged in a week. Honestly the week has been a bit of a blur and I'm trying desperately, and somewhat unsuccessfully, to cling to any bit of sanity I might have left.

First a few shout outs:

UNCLE JOHNNY & AUNT JULIA: YOUR GENEROUS DONATION WAS RECEIVED AND IS ON ITS WAY TO BEING PROCESSED. YOU ROCK! THE THREE STOOGES WOULD BE PROUD!

PMDUDE & MASTER OF THE HOUSE (WIFE): WOW! THANK YOU! YOUR GENEROSITY WAS A BIT UNEXPECTED. WAIT! WHAT? NO NOT THAT I DIDN'T EXPECT YOU TO BE GENEROUS, IT WAS JUST UNEXPECTED THAT YOU WOULD DONATE TO THAT LEVEL OF GENEROSITY. IT STILL SOUNDS LIKE AN INSULT. EITHER WAY, YOU'VE EARNED AT LEAST 5 MINUTES OF ME NOT PICKING ON YOU! YOU ROCK!

With those two donations, I've met my minimum requirement of $2,200! All together now, "WOOHOO!" What? I can't here you Jersey! WOOHOO!

And in other news....

The snow is, thank god, gone! I'd like to say that it's gone for good, but with this fictitious global (that's a joke BTW) warming thing, who knows. All I know is me and a couple million people in the Seattle area are SO ready for summer! Bring. It. On.

My stalker personality has been in a bit of a drought. The illustrious band I stalk has found themselves performing, for the last two months, for larger gigs, and more expensive gigs, than this stalker can afford. I had a moment of weakness in which I was ready to kick them to the curb, but have since come to my senses, and realize I should be okay with "sharing" them with others. Still, I'd like to state for the record, and should anyone from said FANTASTIC band be reading this blog, when will our eyes meet again? When will you be playing the same lounge songs that you are so famous for in a local that is affordable to me - your main stalker? I do believe consideration of my needs should be put in front of say, money! I'm just sayin'. Don't make me go find another band to stalk!

Ahem!

Let's see, what else.

Oh yes, the Great 40th Birthday Bash of Blueberry (try saying that 10 times fast, in heels and downing a bottle of Merlot.) Complete success. We had black balloons, too much food, not enough wine, several cupcakes in cherry chip and chocolate, and friends and family in all their glory! Blueberry's Mom and one of her sisters surprised her by coming over for the weekend to help celebrate. (MomUnit: the photo to right is with your flower/cake you sent to Blueberry. Though since your floating in the Pacific ocean, in 90 degree weather you probably don't care.) While you can't see it in the photo, Blueberry was wearing "Birthday Girl" dilly-bobbers, and a "Over the Hill" necklace provided by your's truly. Anywhooo, all participants seemed to have enjoyed themselves tremendously. A HUGE shout out to the Newlyweds for their assistance in the party planning and execution.

And with that, next topic.

I've had a relatively painful week at work. Suddenly I find myself being challenged by my own stupidity and I hate that. While I'm learning a whole lot, its stuff I wish I already knew so that I could avoid the pain. Suffice it to say, I did some miscommunicationing that caused other people pain and suffering, and for that I have this enormous guilt cloak I'm wearing. Ugh!

If a Blueberry is 40 years old, is it old?

Well Blueberry IS OLD today. HAPPY 40TH BIRTHDAY BLUEBERRY!!!! Forty long years she's been on this earth. And boy could I tell you a few stories. I checked my karma meter and it's pretty low so I probably shouldn't tell you those stories.

We have a big hoopla planned tomorrow to celebrate her birth some 40 years ago. Hard to believe, but I did confirm they had running water and electricity then. Several friends and family will be ascending on my cabana in black, to pay their respect for Blueberry's youth. I'll be sure to post photos from the "wild" party it proves to be. Twenty bucks says we're done and in bed by 9PM.

Do me a favor? Go to your nearest calendar. Check the date. Does your date say April 18th for today? Yah, the key word there is APRIL. Well, someone forgot to tell Mother Nature it's APRIL. Why? IT'S FREAKING SNOWING OUTSIDE! It hasn't snowed in April in 36 years here, and THIS weekend it decides to. Here's the funny thing about Seattle weather. Last Saturday it was 80 degrees. This Saturday it'll be snowing. Tonight it's supposed to get to 28 degrees for a low. The who the what now? We'll never see sun.

Wait! What was that? Thunder? Since when does it thunder and lightening when it snows. Oh holy hell, the apartment alarm was set off by that damn thunder. Pookie's under the bed and won't come out for months now. Decisions Decisions! Do I leave the apt like I'm supposed to when the alarm goes off? Or do I sit here and continue to blog? Yah, I agree. I aint' going outside in this weather.

Now if you'll excuse me I have to go make cherry chip cupcakes for Blueberry's birthday cake. I'm making 40 total. Each one will have a candle. OMG, you totally believed I'd do that.

Oh and Hi Mom and Dad who are gallivanting somewhere in the Panama canal spending my inheritance.

Update: Since I posted the first time, we now have 3.5 inches of snow. WTF!

And I brought home my tulips from work and messed around with the macro lens. No too shabby!

I've Been Remiss!

So I've missed a couple shout outs to friends and family who have recently donated to me. I was doing so well shouting out when the donations came in, but now I blew it. So here's one blog for the most recent donATEERs.

UNCLE BOB & AUNT MARY - Thanks!

UNCLE DICK & COUSIN BRUCE - Danke!

SAUDI FRIENDS THE DIONISIOS - Gracias!

MOM'S GOOD FRIEND CHERYL (Who donated in honor of her mother) - Grazie!

And with that I am a small $345 away from my minimum $2200. Holy Crap! I'm still shocked and stunned at how generous people have been. I shouldn't be, but I am.

I have about 6 "verbal" promises, so I'm quite sure I'll hit my mark by the end of May if not sooner!

There are tulips in the garden; and tulips in the park...

Oh tulips. How I loath thee! I want to love them, but they just aren't cooperating this season.

I took the day off planning on driving up North to the tulip fields. Just me and my camera. Oh glory day. Saturday being almost 80 degrees here I figured that would give the tulips plenty of sun to poke their bright colorful heads out. But noooOOOO...well not all of them anyhow.

I took off this morning bright and early at 8am. I planned on getting up there and to the main garden location by the time they opened, so I could get my photos without people meandering in the background. First car in the parking lot (thought I was going to have to put the stang in 4 wheel drive in the parking lot - sheesh), first person to buy a ticket. The garden wasn't fully blooming yet, but there were enough. Set the camera up to what I thought would be a nice shot, and it doesn't work. What the...? Then I notice...I didn't have my CF memory card. Frickin Frackin! Okay, that's not what I actually said, but you get the idea. Now what? Either I drive all the way home and not bother - or I go find a camera store and buy a new CF card. I figured I needed a back up one anyhow so why not go buy one.

Find the one and only camera store around and they don't open until 9:30. Of course. Why would they be open? So I sat there for 15 minutes and pondered. By the time I decided, I noticed they were open. In I go, plunk my $$ down and I'm out the door. Funny camera guy did have to say they make a lot of $$ on people who forget things. Jerk! Thanks for reminding me.

Back to the garden, and it was crowded already. The sun wasn't shining the whole time, clouds covered it every now and then. But the darn wind was blowing. It's hard to take a close up of a tulip that's moving. Grrr....

But in the end, I think I got some decent shots. I did discover my tri-pod is too tall for closeup flower shots. It doesn't get close enough...maybe I need a new lens to get closer?

All the shots are on my Flickr site, but here are a few of my favorites.

I'm walking on sunshine WooAh

Oh my. I'm pooped, but happy, today. Yesterday BigBro took us off on a supposed 10 mile walk. It was a GORGEOUS day in Seattle. Up in the high 70's and sunny. I got slightly burnt on the face, but I don't care. It's not pasty white any more...of course this means I'll likely get a cold sore too. Oh goody. I can hardly wait for that.

We took off from Golden Gardens park which is on Puget Sound. It's a beautiful park that looks out over the water to the Olympic mountains. We stretched a bit, map in hand and we were off.

Our walk took us past the Ballard Locks. One of my favorite places to go in Seattle. It's a nice areas to watch people and watch boats come and go.

On the other side of the locks, we entered Discovery Park. In all my years in Seattle I've never been to the famous Discovery Park. I had no idea it was so huge. We were in Discovery Park for the majority of the walk. We wondered up this monstrous hill to get into the park. I thought I was going to die. But I kept my head down and kept putting one foot in front of the other. Miraculously I hit the top. Funny that. While I cursed my way up the hill, it's such a feeling of satisfaction when one reaches the top.

Once in the park we walked past this group of people doing some serious training. As we walked by one of the girls in the group yelled, "Way to go 3 Day Walkers!" which got the whole group cheering. I love that! I love it when we go out and people honk, hoot, or say way to go. Makes me realize or more appropriately remind myself why I'm doing this crazy walking thing.

At the end of the meadow, we zigged when we should have zagged and took a slight detour. BigBro had done a training walk there last year and was a little fuzzy on the path. No big. My 5 hour Energy / Aleve cocktail was kicking in, I was good to go.

Yes, I took the 5 hour Energy again. Though this time I put the 3 ounces of "berry -butt flavor" in my water. Hoping the slower consumption would not hit me as hard as the straight shooting did. And it didn't. I felt good the entire time. The hills still killed me. Though they did allow my inner mountain goat to express itself.

Anyhow, BigBro got us back on track by asking people where we were and how could we get to X on the map. The path found us in a fun little hiking trail down to the water. I was ever so thankful we were going down this path instead of up.

At the bottom we hit a trail that walked along the water front. It was beautiful. On our left were the woods, lush and green. And on our right was crystal blue water with the majestic Olympics in the back ground. Just beautiful.

The trail popped us out at a lighthouse that we stopped, took a stretch break/water break and checked the map. BigBro announces that now we get to the "hill". The hill that has been known to kill people - okay that's my drama, but my god this hill was ... well it was steep. I'm not sure how long the climb was, maybe a quarter of a mile or so. All I know is I had to stop twice to stretch out a calf that was YELLING at me and cramping....and, let's not lie, to catch my breath. I thought I was going to hyperventilate. But again, one foot in front of the other I made it to the top. While cursing the entire time up these hills, hitting the top is truly a magnificent feeling. Such accomplishment.

NeicyPoo joined us this trip too. I had to take a photo op with her since they're few and far between. so while we were stretching and watering up I snapped a quick little photo.

We wondered our way around again, not 100% sure where we going. We had the map, but it wasn't necessarily helping us. But we made it our way down the hill and back to the Locks.

Blueberry and I decided a potty break as in need. As I entered I said to Blue "I want a hot dog." Blueberry concurred and I knew a hot dog was going to be in our future. It just sounds soooo good. It might have been the sudden salt craving, but man...meat on a stick really got me to keep walking. So outside the potty we mentioned to BigBro how tasty a hot dog would be. He casually mentions that 7-11 outside the locks sells them. Well, then let's go!

Off we went to 7-11. Hot Dogs! Hot Dogs! Hot Dogs! Thankfully 7-11 did not disappoint. Three hot dogs later we were on our way. Oh man that dog hit the spot.

At the end of the walk, Blueberrie's pedometer read 13.2 miles. BigBro thinks we only went about 11. Blue swears she calibrated her new pedometer correctly, so who knows. We walked somewhere between 11 and 13. It definitely felt like more than 10. Blue and I did walk 4 point something or other today. Her pedometer said 4.12. I then clocked it with the car and it was 4.08 so I'm thinking her 13 miles might be accurate.

With yesterday's walk and today's that puts me over 160 training miles! WooHoo!

Tomorrow is my day of rest. I'm taking the day off to go up north for the tulip festival. The weather is questionable, but I really don't care. All I know is I won't be at work.

Don't Want to be in Public, My head is full of Chapstick

If you know that song without googling, I'll give you a big kiss...maybe. Here I'll give you a hint. See photo.

TWO HUGE SHOUT OUTS TO MAKE:

1) TO: THE RANDOM CO-WORKER WHO SHOCKED THE H*LL OUT OF ME WITH HIS DONATION- YOU ROCK.

2) TO: THE OLD FAMILY FRIENDS FROM OUR SAUDI DAYS: WOW! I'M SO GLAD MOM SUGGESTED I GET IN TOUCH WITH YOU. THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU FOR YOUR DONATION. IT PUT ME OVER THE $1500 MARK.

I've had a lot of odds and ends on my mind this week and am not so sure where to begin, so I'll just start typing. This could be trouble.


While I still very much love my job, I'm at that point with the company where I'm starting to feel very naive about believing they were interested in change. One person wanting change can't do a darn think without the support of many, and or management. I'm sure we're no different than any other small company out there who has the desire to play with the big boys, but still lags painfully behind in the knowledge of "how" to maintain our internal "big boys" feeling. I'm a process improvement person at heart. I love the idea of fixing something that will make the bottom line cleaner and the trip to the bottom line more efficient. I know several others who share this feeling, but trying to get management to agree to improvements is like pulling teeth. I'm not an exec and I don't pretend to even understand what they have to deal with in keeping this company they success it is. But if they'd give even a single minute to thinking about improving just a one or two internal systems, I'm sure they'd see the overall benefit. But I fear this will never happen and so I'll continue to be frustrated and continue to pound my head against the wall to maybe get even a little teeny tiny change.


That got me thinking about change in general and how people are so adverse to it. I was in a seminar a year or so ago that talked about change. The speaker compared a person going through change as similar to a person going through the grieving process. There's anger, uncertainty, sadness, and a few others, to eventually get to acceptance. Once they reach acceptance, they can move on and embrace the change. I remember sitting there wondering why anyone would be adverse to change. It never dawned on me at that point that change could be negative (as in losing your job or your marriage dissolving). I'm more convinced than ever that change is a necessary evil. Good or bad, there's a reason for it and it should be embraced. Which brings me back to the company being less than accepting of change.


Every time I've suggested a change, I've been beat down pretty hard by some folks that now I fear I'm hitting the point in which I feel like, "why bother?" I don't want to be complacent. I know this company can be greater than it already is...I just need to find the strength to get past my frustration and be the stellar PM I know I can be.

I also feel less than adequate of late because the hammer is coming down on how we manage projects. While I am glad because that means I'm learning, the sneaky little devil of insecurity is creeping in and making me question my abilities. And of course, it makes me wonder if they're going to fire me. The thing is I know I'm a good worker. Sure I can improve on a good lot of things, and I feel I am improving, but I can't help but wonder.


But in other more exciting news, last night on the drive home at mach 1, I decided that it might be time to give love a chance. Again.

RUTROW!

The names in the following story have not been changed to protect the not so innocent.

The following conversation took place April 7th at approximately 6pm. My cell phone rings, well actually it doesn't ring it plays Mustang Sally. What? As if there's any other song for my phone.

Jenn: Hello?

Voice on the other end: Jenn? (pant pant)

Jenn: Blueberry?

Blueberry: Jenn, I think I'm lost.

Jenn: Where are you? (dumbest question ever award goes to...)

Blueberry: I started walking from my condo and turned right went up Jefferson (at this point Jenn has tuned slightly out) and crossed over 99 and am trying to get to 164th.

Jenn: Well, give me some landmarks.

Blueberry: There's a Safeway and a Starbucks.

(I think, "Hmmm, that narrows it down in Seattle.)

Jenn: Are you walking?

Blueberry: Yes, I left my condo turned right and walked down 148th. I crossed 99 and expected 148th to turn into 164th.

Jenn: Ahh, Blue, 148th runs parallel to 164th. It won't EVER run into it. Now, where are you exactly?

Blueberry: On 148th.

At this point, it should be noted that I think I have an idea where she is, but I'm having way too much fun to give in. Oh, and it should also be noted that it's pouring rain outside.

Jenn: And so what do you want from me?

Blueberry: Well, um, er, um, do you know how I get home?

Jenn: Backtrack. 148th will not run into 164th so turn around and go back.

Blueberry: So I'm soaking wet. My shoes are wet, my pants are wet.

Jenn: Do you want me to come and get you? Because I need to know now. I have rice cooking on the stove and need to know whether to turn it off or not.

Blueberry: Would you mind?

My thought, "Would I mind? Let's see. It's pouring rain outside. I have dinner cooking on the stove. I'm in my PJs ready to settle in for the night...I might mind."

Jenn: Okay, now where are you?

Blueberry: (she sounds slightly frustrated at this point) There was a Safeway and a Starbucks up on 99.

Jenn: Is there a Taco Bell across the street.

Blueberry: I don't remember.

Note: Do you see? Do you see why it's fun to play with her?

Jenn: I think I know where that is. Turn around. Walk back to Safeway and I'll meet you there.

Blueberry: Okay.

So I got in the stang, drove out to pick her up and giggled the entire way. She had walked and got lost. She thought she knew where she was. She thought the road she was on would cross another road she knew of. Though she didn't realize they run parallel. Directions aren't her strong suit.

BIG SHOUT OUT TO MOM'S FRIEND GINNIE FOR HER GENEROUS DONATION!!!!!

I've not written about an update to the adventure of 2008 of late, but suffice it to say, things are still going well. I've walked a total of 145 training miles to date. By the time all is said and done, if I stay to the to the training schedule, I will have walked 765 training miles. Oy vei. That makes me tired just thinking about it.

"Any Man with a Uterus is a Woman"

The quote of the night. It's a very long story, but suffice it to say that during my little dinner party last night the conversation moved to this guy/girl combo who's pregnant. The discussion quickly went down hill, but the quote of the night goes to The Groom of the Newlyweds - see title.

Last night was yet another VERY successful - if I don't say so myself - dinner gathering. Sometimes I think I must have been a chef in a previous life. I so love cooking. I really need to find someone to cook for on a permanent basis. My +1.

The menu last night was:
Spicy Szechwan Chicken - without the chicken. I used flank steak instead. ZOMG that recipe is so dang good.

Szechwan Green beans - Yah so I couldn't find enough good looking green beans to make enough for 6 people. So I tossed in some baby carrots and snap peas. Delicious. A bit spicy, but hey, who doesn't like spice?

Mashed potatoes with cream cheese - not Asian I know. But I've had this recipe for years and finally decided to test it out. Just okay. It needed more garlic. Oh wait, it didn't have any garlic, no wonder I didn't like it.

Blueberry brought her famous Chinese Salad...though I think it's titled Oriental salad, and I'm trying to be more PC by calling it Chinese. Though I suppose it could be Asian. Who knows. Who cares. All I know is I had to stop some guests from licking the bottom of the bowl.

Dessert was angel food cake, ice cream, and strawberries - courtesy of the newlyweds. They thought I was odd to ask for my cake on the side. No I don't want ice cream and strawberries messing up angel food cake. Making is all moist...sick! No moist cake! Ick!

We managed to drink our way through 3 bottles of wine - which helped my overstocked wine rack. Now at least all the wine I own fits on the rack and I don't need to buy a second. Darn it! Cuz I found one I really REALLY like.

Yesterday, Blueberry and I managed to walk a whole 5 miles. Her foot is still healing (did I mention she stepped on a screw last weekend?) and so she didn't think she could go on. So at 4.8 miles in an attempt to avoid a scary man dressed in a cow outfit we ducked into Elmer's and had breakfast. Full bellies, we walked the additional .2 miles home. By then I was knackered and just wanted to not walk anymore. Yesterday's walk takes me to 145 training miles, I think. I might have missed a mile or two. Today was just cross training. The weather is questionable and I thought crosstraining was more my speed considering the wine haze I woke up with. Oh and the pile of dishes waiting to be done.

I went grocery shopping today for the week and I gotta tell you people are absolutely stupid. See being all perfect and everything, I feel I can say such things. There was this - I think woman though the jury's still out - in front of me in line who absolutely refused to run her debit card through the debit card reader to pay for her groceries. She "demanded" the cashier run it. After about 3 minutes of the cashier trying to explain to Crazy that it was the same reader, the cashier took her card and I kid you not, ran it through the SAME machine she wouldn't run it through. She said nothing. No complaint no nothing. Seemed to be completely fine with it. Then the cashier asked her to put in her "super secret security code". And instead of typing it in, she TOLD the cashier and the line her "super secret security code". If I were the type to steal a person's identity I could have been Crazy in 2.5 seconds. But wait, it gets better. I know. You're asking yourself how, right? So Crazy stood at the end of the counter and revisited every single item on her receipt, checking it off that they were in a bag. Mostly unloading bags as she went. I was super speedy, paid for my stuff, and squeezed past Crazy to go to Starbucks. What? It's right there, I couldn't resist. Crazy followed me. As I stood waiting for my coffee, I watched Crazy slide her card through the debit card reader at Starbucks. I just don't get some people. Maybe she thought the other one was possessed or something. Or maybe, just maybe her meds kicked in. I'm just sayin.

Okay, I'm done rattling on and providing the few religious readers I have - who have been bugging me to post I might add - with something to do for a minute or too. Now I have to get back to whatever it was I was doing before I got distracted by this big shiny computer screen.