Money Money Money

I'm sure everyone, at some point, has thought about what they'd do if they won "the big" one. The lottery that would make you a wealthy person who wouldn't have to think about $$ for the rest of their lives. 

My mom and I used to talk about this all the time. She had a laundry list of who she'd take care of, who she'd buy houses for, who's education she'd pay for etc. She would, of course, do something for herself, but only after she took care of her kids and grand kids. 

In fact, I remember one time we had a specific amount that she won. She gave all of it away and then some. 

For my part, when we played this game I was always happy to take care of her - buy her house, buy her care, send her on a trip, set her up with $$ for fun. Then I'd do stuff for myself. I rarely found I needed to take care of nieces and nephews etc. 

Now with mom gone, I have to think about what I'd actually do. I find I'm thinking more about taking care of others as well. 

Here's what I'd do...though I reserve the right to not do any of this if I win the big one. <insert snarky smile here>:

1. Buy a home - house/townhouse/condo - whatever.

2. Buy a fancy pants Mustang...I mean a REAL Mustang that growls. 

3. Donate to an animal charity

4. Put some $$ aside for education for any niece or nephew who wanted/needed it. This money would come with a string attached though. I wouldn't want to just give it. I'd pay for education quarter by quarter...not one LUMP sum of money.

5. I'd give each niece/nephew/greats a bit of $$. They'd all get the same amount. No strings attached. They can do whatever they want. 

6. I'd travel... ALOT. I might even bring random people with me.

And it should be stated that if this ever actually happened, the first thing I'd do is get me an accountant and lawyer. I'd want to be more responsible with the money, but it's always fun to pretend you don't have any obligations. 

What would you do?

Mom's Gray Box

I think most my friends know I love to cook. I get that love from my parents. Both mom and dad loved to cook. Both of them also loved to collect recipes - which I too do a lot of! 

When mom passed I brought home her gray recipe box of old recipes. They are handwritten, typed, magazine clippings, etc. Some of them are so amusing that I feel like I have to make them just because. 

Many years ago I came up with a goofy system that would get me cooking a lot of those recipes. I took my spreadsheet of recipes (yes I have a spreadsheet) and printed the recipe names, the cookbook and the page on a piece of paper. I cut them into strips and put them into a jar. 

Weekly I'd pull 4-5 recipes out of the jar. The jar (ok it was a HUGE brandy glass) didn't include anything like appetizers or desserts/cookies. Only items that would be for dinner. 

It got me to try a lot of new recipes, but the maintenance of it was a pain. Every time I added recipes to the spreadsheet, I had to find a way to add them to the jar. Finally, I gave up. I never gave up the spreadsheet though. 

Enter the app Paprika. ALL my recipes are in Paprika. Since most of them are from the Internet these days adding them to Paprika isn't that difficult. I still have the spreadsheet, and now the spreadsheet has the Gray Box recipes and all my recipes are in one place. Gone are the days of cookbooks. 

In order to select recipes, because I like having them random, I turned to friends and asked them to select a number between 1 and whatever the line item is in Excel (somewhere above 1000). That got to be complicated...so I finally realized that there MUST be an app for a random number generator. And sure enough there is. 

So the day before I go shopping, I randomly select 5-7 recipes and then determine which ones I will likely make that week. If it lands on a number of a recipe I've made before, I choose another number. If it lands on a dessert or cookies I make it that week. 

It's fun. It means I try a lot of new recipes. Each recipe I try goes on my cooking blog for others to enjoy. 

It might sound complicated and confusing, but it really does get me to try a bunch of new recipes. My goal this year is 100 new recipes. I figured two new recipes a week on average. I've made 33 so far - and the year is half way over - which means I'd better get on my game and fast. I need to make 11 new recipes a month to hit my goal. 

This week's recipes are all new and I hope all delicious. 

Decisions. Decisions.

You ever wonder how different your life would be if you made a different decision?

I do all the time. I don’t have regrets about my decisions. In fact, quite the opposite, I feel proud of them. But there are some very poignant times in my life where it could have gone the other way.

I’m watching this show on Investigative Discovery (yes, more murder and mayhem) and one of the survivors of this serial killer made a last minute decision to go out that night. She hadn’t planned to. She just decided she wanted to meet up with her friends at the bar after all. Obviously that decision changed her life.

While none of mine are that drastic, I do spend a decent amount of time thinking about the What Ifs.

What if I had decided to not join my friend Christy at the youth group in the early 1980’s? Dad was so sure that being a part of the church back then really helped keep me on the straight and narrow. Admittedly I had been hanging out with a “friend” who I followed into a bit of trouble (vandalism of all things). Mom and Dad, of course, put their foot down. And that was the last time I did anything with Anna DeGuzman.

What if I had chosen to stay in Seattle and go to Lake Washington HS instead of going to boarding school?  This one his huge to me. Not only would I not have some of the best friends I currently have, but I am pretty sure I wouldn’t have the travel bug. I’d probably be content just sticking close to home. Hard to say, really.

What if I had said YES to a young man who wanted to marry me? Would I still be married? Would I have had kids? I certainly wouldn’t have the life I have now. Is it better? Don’t know. Would I be any happier? I certainly wouldn’t be living here in Seattle – he went the military route, so chances are high I would have moved all over the place.

What if I had not left Boeing and wen to work at Microsoft? Would I still be there? Would have had all the work experiences that I’ve had? Would have gone down the Project Management road? Probably not.

With each of those decisions, my life would be different. Maybe better, maybe not? That’s the great thing about decisions…you make the best one you can with the information you have. Or if you’re making a decision with your heart, you hope for the best.

I think of all the things that define my life now, cooking, photography, scrapbooking, closeness to family, constant attempt to lose weight…would ANY of these be a part of my life had I made any other decisions?

One decision that has plagued me and that is a big regret with me is not going to Tucson in December of 2016. Granted, the blood clots stopped me, but what if I had made healthier choices earlier in my life and learned to love eating healthy…I wouldn’t have the blood clots and I would have been able to spend one last Christmas with mom. I can almost guarantee we would have eaten out almost every night I was there, we would have had dinner with so many friends she has down there, we would have gone shopping, we would have talked and chattered for hours. We probably would have had a great time cooking Christmas dinner – which could have been anything. I would have left before my birthday because I liked to be home for my birthday. I would have left telling her how much I love her and that we’ll talk soon. She would have told me to text her when I made it home. Would I have noticed something was right with her and made her go into the doctors? Maybe. Maybe not. I don’t really linger on that thought too much thankfully.

As I start thinking about my future and decisions that are going to need to be made I wonder whether I’ll look back on them with any regrets. Or will I feel confident that I’m doing the right thing for me at the time? Probably the latter.  

Suddenly we're at day 80!

As I sit and type this I cannot believe we've been sheltering in place for 80 days. I've not been in my office or seen my work peeps for 80 days. 

I am not alone when I say that it feels like we're in the movie Ground Hog's day! Every day seems like the last. Nothing differentiates the days. 

What's happened in the last 20 days...well...here's a list:

1. I finished some great books. The Elephant Whisperer, Where the Crawdads Sing, and The Last Boleyn. All great reads and certainly long books that is helping add to my goal of a certain number of pages. 

2. I've been cooking like crazy. Since I'm home, I figured I might as well focus on new recipes. I want to try 75 new recipes this year. I'm well on my way and think I can make it. I've had some good ones. You can find them on my cooking blog if you're interested.  

3. I've been watching a ton of TV. Too much TV really. It's on almost all day as noise in the background as I work. For some reason working in silence distracts me so I just have the TV going. I've recently been watching the 3 part mini-series on the History Channel on Grant. Pretty interesting to me. Funny how the older I get the more interested in history I become. 

4. Seeing people has been hard. I met Blueberry last Saturday for Pizza in a Parking Lot. We sat in our respective cars and ate pizza and chatted. This weekend I'm meeting some colleagues at work for a tailgate lunch...again in the parking lot. I miss people. I miss entertaining. I miss hugs. 

5. Traveling has, of course, stopped. The Niece and I, though, managed a quick trip to Eastern Washington to clean up the headstones in prep for Memorial Day. As always it was a fun, but fast, trip. Harder to do when bathrooms aren't nearly as available as they are when restaurants are open. But we survived. 

In a couple of days, I bet I could copy and paste this blog ... the same will be happening. Over and Over again. 

Day 60...can you believe it?

Yesterday was day 60 of quarantine. I never would have thought when I was sent home on March 9th that'd we'd still be at home in May. Yet here we are! The governor has us on a 4 stage plan to get back to the new normal. He says there will be 3 weeks between each phase, which means that puts us into Sept before we can get back to a normal...it won't be "normal" like it was. No, it'll be a new normal. I can't wait to see what that looks like.

Cammie and I took off yesterday for our annual Odessa or Bust trip. We missed last year because she was working. She pinged me on Monday and it was an immediate YES. We took off at 9am with blue skies and what promised to be a warm day. First song on the playlist? On the Road Again! Mom and Dad used to play this song every time they set out of one of their new adventures. I figured, why not keep that tradition.

The sun stayed out all day, and in Eastern Wa it got up to 71 only.  It was actually warmer in Seattle than Eastern Wa, which isn't normal.

We stopped in Cle Elum to pee and get some breakfast. While we were there we decided to see if Owens Meats was opened to get jerky. It was! It was packed, and I have to say people were not social distancing like I had expected.

Jerky in hand...off we went. The "tradition" is when we get off the freeway to get onto Hwy 21, Cammie gets to drive. The first couple of times she was nervous to drive, but this time she seemed to approve and even enjoy the way Wroamin gripped the road. There's a section where the road gets a bit curvy. The "joke" her dad told her when she was learning to drive is she couldn't use brakes... ahhh, sure... I told her...go ahead. She couldn't. She wasn't comfortable enough with the car. It would have done fine, but I appreciated her being aware of her insecurities and not doing it.

We finally got to the cemetery, drove Wroamin in and took a deep breath. This part of the trip is always the most difficult. This time though it seemed worse, the Bohemian Cemetery looked horrible. It doesn't look like anyone is keeping it up they way it had. It looked like it hadn't been mowed for awhile. The weeds were calf deep.

We did what we do...cleaned the headstones, removed old flowers and put in new ones (we take the old flowers and put them on other family member graves who might be missing some), had a moment of silence, and just existed with our loved ones. We miss them so much.

Our next stop is the German cemetery where we stop to see our cousin Cindy. Every single time we forget where Cindy is. We "think" we know, but we always end up parking and walking the rows until we find her. THIS time we both made a note that she's back by the far corner, so maybe next time we won't forget. We will. But we like to pretend.

Back in the car and off for home. We slathered up more sunscreen - because we've learned our lesson. Stopped in Moses Lake for lunch and sat in the parking lot eating our cheeseburgers.

Our last and final traditional stop is the scenic view over the Columbia River. The wind is usually blowing like mad so we take crazy photos of our hair all over the place. Yesterday, not so much. Pretty calm considering.

The day went by too quickly. I do so enjoy these days with her. Thrilled she still wants to spend time with me. We barely talk in the car, she's a pretty quiet person, but just being around each other and then when we do talk it's usually pretty worthwhile conversation.

The fun I like to have is putting together a playlist that I'm SURE she will not approve of. She knows my taste of music tends towards 80's and she tolerates it. I personally think it's her "pretending" to tolerate it. I see her singing along. After every song, you can almost feel her wait with baited breath to see how bad the next song will be. "Bad" being all relative.

The other thing that happened is Wroamin flipped over to 19,000 miles. I leased Wroamin - though always planning to keep it - and the lease gave me 32,000 in 3 years - which is July 6th. If I were to turn this car in, I'd be well within the lease parameters. We were 2 miles from home when it flipped over so I had to pull over and take a photo.

Now, I'm back home. By myself. Well, me and the cats. They were a bit put out that I was gone all day yesterday. There was a lot of cat cuddling last night just to settle the two down.

36 days and counting

We're now on the 36th day of Shelter in Place. While I agree 100% with this plan, it sucks beyond belief. Though, to be fair, I don't have to deal with entertaining children and trying to keep my sanity, so there is a silver lining. The demons are getting restless too. I think they're tired of me being at home.

I've been having some knee problems for a couple of weeks and decided to take a chance and go to the doctor on Friday. I avoided WebMD at all cost because if I had looked there I'm sure I would have determined I needed to amputate... :-(

Doctor said it's my old pal Arthur Itis. That I can deal with. He gave me some exercises and stretching to do while I'm sitting at home. It was better yesterday, but today is oddly sorer than before. I can't explain it.

After the doctor visit I figured I was out I might as well do some grocery shopping. Had to get some staples and other items to make lunches/dinners with. I should be good for a week or so. 

As we all practice these new rules - social distancing, wiping down shopping carts, being kinder to our neighbors, I can't help but wonder if we'll continue when this passes. I'm sure we won't, but it's a nice thought to think that this will teach us all some decent human kindness. The fear now is how all these folks who are out of work are going to survive - then how is our economy going to survive. So frightening to think.

So, this blog speaks to how "exciting" things are these days. In my more bored times, I'm making lists of the things I want to do when we can. People I want to see and places to go just exist.

20 Days in Captivity

Today is the 20th day that I've been stuck in the house. Working from home, not going out, not seeing friends and family. It's stinks! People keep calling this our "new normal" and I'm like "I hope not".  Life will definitely be different AFTER this crazy, but I hope this isn't our normal.

Billie sent me a funny text this week that made me smile. She said, "You know what's funny? Dad would be saying, "I told you so! This is why I hoard food.." He and mom would be so set for this." And you know what...she's totally right. Though Mom, god love her, would be Queen Hypochondriac with this.

Since I've been stuck at home I thought it a good opportunity to the a "Currently" review.

Loving: The fact that the weather has been so nice. Loving that spring is on it's way. I hope we can get out of the house by then!

Hating: This Virus! I hate it more than Brussels sprouts!

Eating: Not healthy that's for sure! I have felt the need for comfort food this week. Did a tator tot casserole and Hunter's Stew

Reading: Eleanor Oliphant Is Completely Fine. It's our book club book this month. It's good. Amusing and well written. Looking for a quick read? This might be your book. Vines & Spines will be doing a virtual book club on Wednesday...first time ever. Should be interesting.

Watching: I just binged 9-1-1! I started watching 9-1-1 Lone Star and found I loved it, so figured I'd check out the original series. I love it too!! Back in the day Mom used to LOVE the show Emergency with Randolph Mantooth and Kevin Tighe. That was the one night we were allowed to eat dinner in the "living room" (we were on base housing. There wasn't really any more rooms in the house besides bedrooms.).  Each episode of Emergency they'd find themselves saving someone and in crazy situations all the while calling...literally calling into Rampart Hospital.  Well 9-1-1 is the newest rendition of this type of show and I love it. I watched the first two seasons and am caught up in the 3rd meeting.

Listening: Nothing! The first time I've listened to music was during yesterday's Virtual Happy Hour for the company. About a dozen of us showed up and the theme was "What's your Job Theme Song?" I've known my theme song theme song since the second week on the job. It's never changed...Crazy Train by Ozzy Osborne.

Creating: Today I took the day off - not because work is busy - but because I just needed a break from the routine. I plan on being in the SB room all day. I tore up the San Diego 3Day last weekend and think I'll finish the Traveler's Notebook today. I'm trying to get as many 12X12s converted before I move - so I don't have to pack so many big 12X12 scrapbooks.

So that's it! These blogs are likely to become more boring than normal since I'm not actually doing anything. And guess what? I've got 4 more weeks of this. We're not going back to the office until the end of April!

COVID - what?

The world has learned a new word.... COVID-19. It's the ONLY thing people are talking about these days and it has the world, country, state, city, neighborhoods on edge.

COVID19 is a flu virus. A deadly, horrible flu virus. It started in China and found it's way to the US and the world now. Thousands have died and Seattle appears to be the epicenter of it in the US. We have a rehabilitation center for the elderly that has been hit the hardest and then it just exploded.

That was 2 weeks ago. Two weeks when the company told all of us to go home and WFH until the end of April. EIGHT WEEKS of WFH. Oh Lord...I am just not sure I can do that. I miss my work peeps.

The answer to stopping this flu is also a new term "social-distancing". The way to stop the spread is to not interact with people. Stay at home. Less likely to pass this along. Makes sense! Yet people are not getting it. So many people are out and about NOT practicing social-distancing.

The other weird thing that has been happening is hoarding of toilet paper. Why? No one is sure. It's not like this is a stomach flu and - well - you may need the TP. It's insane the amount of hoarding of TP and hand sanitizer has been going on.

For me, when this first started I didn't take it as serious as I am now. It felt like it was something that the media got all hyped up about and it moved on. Turns out, that's not been the case. Instead, it's getting worse before it gets better. I'm literally forcing myself to not be fearful, but be safe instead. It's easy to get anxious about this type of thing...the unknown. We do know that COVID19 is a bad flu - respiratory bad. Mostly elderly and folks with compromised immune systems are the most likely to get it and have the worse of it. The rest of us, if treated and paid attention to correctly, will survive it. 80% survive.

This will impact my trip in May too. 100% sure that Janet and I won't be traveling to Europe in May. In fact, we've talked about post poning until Sept / Oct - hoping this will be over by then.

Th economic impact of this is also significant. Restaurants are closed for dine-in. Many are still doing take out, many have closed all together. This will be a huge impact on several employees income. It makes me sad for small businesses and people who run them. And this economic impact will last for a year or more easily. The stock market is low, and crashing all the time. This feels like a HUGE recession on our way again. Oh goody.

So...the world has learned some new terms and are slowly learning a new way of life during these social-distancing days. I'm not a fan. But I'm also not a fan of being sick, or passing on any germs so I'm being diligent at keeping myself at home.

Oh March...

Maybe I should make an annual goal of writing in the block at least once a month. That seems to be my speed these days, so it's a goal I'd hit for sure.

I'm feeling a bit meh today. Yesterday I didn't feel great - felt like maybe a cold was coming on.  Today I just feel exhausted. I'm wondering if it's more allergies now than a cold.  At any rate, I know it's NOT the corona virus.

Since I wasn't feeling overly energetic today I decided it was a good day to start research on my next big trip in May. Sister in Law and I are going on a Viking Rhine River cruise and we're starting in Lugano, Switzerland - home of the boarding school I attended - TASIS.

Before every trip I feel obligated to research and learn of all the things we may or may not see. The history of the country we're visiting, the history and what not of each town, the churches in the town, the politics etc. I find it prepares me for what I'm going to experience. Some people think it takes the surprise out of the trip, but I'm not one for surprises on a trip. I have an overwhelming feeling of missing something, that I can't help myself but to be prepared.

And so today I reviewed all the excursions on this cruise. Viking includes an excursion at each port of call. They also have "extra" ones - many of which are at the same time as the included ones. When I first looked I thought there may be some extras I wanted to go on, but today I found that I'd be happy with the included ones.

Day 1: Breisach Germany - The Black Forest
I've been through the black forest after graduation in 1987 as we traveled up to visit our foreign exchange student in Muchengladbach.

Day 2: Strasbourg France - Highlights tour
These are always my favorites. You have minimal time in one location and a highlight tour really does a good job showing you just that.

Day 3: Speyer, German - Walking tour
Gotta get my exercise somehow. Why not walk through the old town and see things up close.
Speyer is home to the largest of the three Romanesque imperial cathedrals. And I love me some cathedrals.

Day 4: Koblenz, Germany - The Fortress of Ehrenbreitstein
Koblenz is what's known as the middle rhine. It's where you start to really see castle after castle. I'm 100% sure we drove through, past or around this area in 1987 since I have a photo of one of the castles. At any rate, the included excursion is a fortress and this is like a castle.

Day 5: Cologne, German - Walking tour
Something tells me a 2 hour walking tour isn't going to be enough here.

Day 6: Kinderdijk, the Netherlands - Kinderdijk Windmills
If Don Quixote wasn't from Spain...he'd battle his giants here. These beauties are iconic and I cannot wait to see them.

We're still figuring out what we're going to do in Lugano. We have a walking tour booked and know we want to, obviously, see the school. We've got time, we'll figure it out.

We'll also be spending two days in Basel - which is where the cruise begins. They have some walking tours and a hop on hop off type of bus tour...

I'm getting excited for this and it's only a mere 70 days away. Which reminds me, I'd better get to the gym more often than once a week so I can keep up with the SIL.

In Like a Lion...

I'm so glad January is done. I'm not sure why it was such a tough month, but it seems like everyone feels like it. January had snow, and was the 6th wettest January for our area. Yesterday, through last night, was another soaker. There are places in the Seattle area that got almost 8 inches.  EIGHT inches of rain!! Which means, flooding.

Thankfully, heavy rains are not moving to "scattered" showers. Which, frankly, I hate. I like the hard pounding rain. I just don't like it constantly. Though, silver lining, it's not snow.

So bring it on February, let's see what you got.

In other news, I hear there's an impeachment trial going on. And that's all that I know. I am purposely staying away from that mess. Nothing good comes out of discussing that .. and if I were honest, nothing useful comes out of staying in touch with it. Both sides lie, so we'll never know.

And in still other news...I finished ONE book in January! ONE. My goal this year is 50 books this year - which means I need to average about 4 a month. The thing is, I have a bunch of books over 400 pages and those take so long to get through. For that reason, I think I may be changing my goal to a number of pages. Last year I read 17,000 total pages. I think that shall be my goal.

Work still seems to be a big focus in my life. We're about to have some changes at work that may not get me the VP promotion I was anticipating and being groomed for. New CEOs tend to change things up so I shouldn't be surprised. It's funny how I really didn't want to be a VP originally. Afraid of it. I didn't know if I could do it. Then I slowly realized, and was told, no one knows how to be a VP, you just learn. So then I wanted to be a VP. Now that it might not happen, I'm bummed. I've worked hard for where I am and have endured some amazing, soul crushing times. If the VP thing doesn't happen, maybe they can at least promote me to Senior Director!

All that at work, and I gotta say the company has changed so drastically. We have a set of leaders in place now that are so fantastic. So amazing. So smart and I'm so glad it's there now. The work remains interesting and the changes are scary but fun. We're all being pushed to move faster and make decisions that will help us move faster. I love that!

Today starts my "no drinking" February.  I have one wine tasting date I already put on the calendar, but other than that I'm going to try to not drink this month. This is for now reason other than it's on my list of 50 things to do this month. It won't be difficult really. I don't drink that much. Wine on Sunday dinner and occasionally at dinners out.

Janet and I are also on the count down to our up and coming trip. We got our air set up and that seemed to tip us into the "OMG this is happening". I need to really get to the gym now  (she says every single freakin' month) and get my walking stamina up. Look out Switzerland...here we come.

In Memory of Mom...

Today was the 3rd Annual "Let's Go to Salty's for Mom" brunch. This year we expanded the invite list to include the Pantry goat and Mr & Mrs. Braspir. Unfortunately the PantryGoat was sickish (the smell of food made her sick) and Mrs. Braspir was off saving the world with the Red Cross. So that left, Seattle SIL, The Niece, Blueberry, Mr. Braspir and myself to sit and eat like gluttons in memory of mom.

And oh boy did we.

You never can get the full value out of this buffet cuz there's SO MUCH FOOD. But Salty's puts on a fantastic brunch.

Thursday marked 3 years since Mom passed. This year was very different from the last two. The first year was...well, hard. Last year was so so. This year... whoa. Grief is so bizarre.

Usually the week leading up to it is the hard part. I get myself all in a tither when I think about the day that's coming up. Then when the day arrives, nothing.

This year, we had a snow event that took my mind off everything, apparently. Then suddenly on the 16th my mind went, "Ahh yes...I know what today is." and it hit me. Grief.

I miss mom so much. I miss her daily. So many times I have wanted to call her. So many things I've wanted to tell her. She'd be so proud of where I am and what I'm doing. She'd be so proud of all her grandkids too. She is missed by all.

Did I mention we had a snow event? Lord. I hate snow so much. It's pretty and all, but when it hits the streets here the city shuts down. I have zero confidence with driving in the snow and Wroamin just doesn't do well, so I stay home.

Then what happens is I get cabin fever and MUST go out. That happened about the time my boss wanted me in the office so he drove out to pick me up and took me home later. It was good to get out of the house for sure.

The snow is gone now...mostly. There's still some on the ground in big piles where it was plowed. Otherwise it's long gone. I really hope that's all we have for this year.

As for how the year's going...so far so good. I'm still feeling super motivated with My Little Word - "Finish it!". Been working on a decluttering schedule this month. It feels so good to declutter and get rid of stuff. With planning on moving in a year, I need to be prepared to have half the crap I currently have.

Ok. I'm going to spend the rest of the day napping. I'm stuffed beyond belief...super thirsty but can't drink too much because I'm so stuffed.

For the Love of Books

Every year I have a goal to read 50 books. Some years I make it, some I don't. Last year I made it.  I read a total of 54 books. That's more than1 a week!

And in case you're wondering, that's 16,601 pages read!

I had moments where I would finish one book and start another. Then I had moments where I didn't read anything for a month. I have no real rhyme or reason with what, how, and when I read.

I love having the Nook App on my phone because that means I can read at any time. Waiting for a dr. appt...I can read.

So here we are in 2020 and I have a LIST of books I want to read. At the end of the day, I love reading. If I hit my goal, Great! If I don't, so be it.

As a review, here's what I read in 2019 with my opinions on each book.

Let's start with my favorites. Only two that really rose to the top as far as favorites. I read these two one right after another and both of them were so good I've tried to share the word to anyone who would listen.

The Girl You Left Behind by Jojo Moyes (5+stars - that's how good it was) - This book! I can't even begin to tell you what a wonderful book this was. It's set in WWII and present day. It bounces between a story of two women. You don't fully understand why until towards the end of the book. It's written brilliantly and it comes together so well. I'd reread this book for sure.

Echoes by Maeve Binchy (5+ stars) - I've read a couple of her books and each on stayed with me for a bit. This book stayed with me. In fact, it stayed with me so much when I finished reading it, the next day I wondered what the characters were doing. I fell in love with the characters and the story. Set in Ireland, which I love, it's a story of life in a small town, love, and how people try to avoid their destinies.

Next, the books from the book club, Vines & Spines. We've read some good ones this year, and we've read some duds. I rank my books in stars 0-4 with 4 being great and zero being don't bother.

Bold spirit "Helga Estby's Forgotten Walk Across Victorian America by Linda Lawrence Hunt (0 stars) - Not my favorite. It's interesting from a historical perspective, but meh.

Boy Erased by Garrand Conley (1 star) - This was my selection. I thought it would be way more interesting than it was. The only interesting part to me was that people are crazy enough to think conversion therapy works.

Daughters of the Night Sky by Aimie K. Runyah (2 stars) - This book is about the women pilots in WWII. The history was interesting, the story was ok, the ending, not so great.

Dear Mrs. Bird by AJ Pearce (1 star) - I had to look up what this book was even about. Guess that tells you how much I liked it.

Glory Over Everything: Beyond the Kitchen House by Kathleen Grissom (3 stars) - Last year we read The Kitchen House and this year we read the sequel. Great book. Great writing. The two are a good read.

How the Garcia Girls Lost their Accents by Julia Averez (1 star) - Again, another book that was just meh for me. What was interesting about this book is the look at how immigrants have to deal with life in America.

The Light Between Oceans by M. L. Stedman (4 stars) - Probably one of my all time favorites that we've read in book club. Such good writing, such a good story. Sad, happy, thoughtful, it had everything.

Love and Ruin by Paula McLain (4 stars ) - One of the first years of book club we read the Paris Wife about one of Ernest Hemmingway's wives. This book is about one of his other wives. I've gotta say, he was quite a cad. This, however, was a great book. The Paris Wife was one of my favorites for sure and this one was yet another favorite.

The Broken Girls by Simone St. James (4 stars) - This was my pick for January 2020 actually but I read it in December 2019. If you like mysteries, this is the book for you. Not at all gruesome or violent - but a mystery all the same.

The Handmaid's Tale by Margaret Atwood (0 stars) - I had high hopes for this book because I'm a fan of fantasy and futuristic stories. The TV show looked interesting too. Yet this book just didn't hit the mark for me.

The Long Winter by Laura Ingle Wilder (2 stars) - This is book 6 of the Little House on the Prairie series. I loved that TV show in the 80's but never read a book of hers. Over all this one wasn't great for me. The LONG Winter just went on and on and on. What was interesting is reading and understanding how people survived back then.

The Silent Wife by Kerry Fisher (2 star) - Yet another I had to look up to see what it was about but once I did I remembered I liked this book. Also a mystery and an easy read.

And lastly...

The Sun Also Rises by Ernest Hemingway (0 star) - Mrs. Braspir decided since we had read two books about his wives we should read one of his books. I wasn't a fan of him in high school and I thought maybe as an adult I'd like him more. Nope! Still don't like his writing. Still don't have a clue what this book is about.

I read two young adult books, or what I consider young adult books, this year.

Paper Towns by John Green (2 stars) - I loved Fault in our Stars so I figured I'd probably love other books by him. This book was good. Interesting. I got a bit tired of one of the main characters, but overall a good, quick read.

Speak by Laurie Halse Anderson (2 stars) - I wish I could tell you how I came across this book. I usually know how books come into my life, but this one I don't have a clue. It's about a high school girl that is an outcast because she called the cops on a high school party. She becomes so isolated she stops speaking all together. In her art class she finds a way to face what happened at the party...she was raped. She begins to heal when she runs into the guy again. This book hits a home run with regards to what high schoolers have to deal with in today's world.

The rest of the books are romance, sci-fi, fantasy, and other...

One self help book, Emotional Intelligence 2.0. Had to read it for a Leadership Foundation Class. Good book. Got some good pointers out of it.

Books by Lynsay Sands - she's one of my favorite authors. Usually writing about vampires.

• A Lady in Disguise
• Bliss
• Sweet Revenge
• The Wrong Highlander: Highland Brides

The Callaway Series by Barbar Freethy - New author for me this year. These are the typical romance books. Boy meets girl. They fall in love. There's an issue. They resolve it. They live happily ever after. 

• On a Night Like This (Callaways #1)
• So This is Love (Callaways #2)
• Falling for a Stranger (Callaways #3)
• Between Now and Forever (Callaways #4)

Books by Katie MacAlister - also one of my favorite authors. Also writes about the other world, vampires, werewolves, etc.

• Bird of Paradise 
• Born Prophesy #1 – Fireborn
• Born Prophesy #2 - Starborn
• Dragon Unbound (Dragon Falls #3.5)

Cassie Scot series by Christine Amsden - stumbled into this series this year. They're young adult type books about the other world. 

• Cassie Scot #1 - Cassie Scot
• Cassie Scot #2 - Secrets and Lies
• Cassie Scot #3 - Mind Games
• Cassie Scot #4 - Stolen Dreams
• Cassie Scot #5 - Madison's Song
• Cassie Scot #6 - Kaitlin's Tale
• Cassie Scot #7 – Frozen

The rest...

• Forever My Girl by Heidi McLaughin
• Midnight on the River Grey by Abigail Wilson
• Chronicles of the One #1 - Year One by Nora Roberts
• Chronicles of the One #2 - Of Blood and bone by Nora Roberts
• City of Ashes (The Mortal Instruments Series #2) by Cassandra Clare
• Diary of the White Witch by Melissa de la Cruz
• Shades of Wicked (Nicht Rebel #1) by Jeaniene Frost
• Deadman's Cross #1 - Deadmen Walking by Sherrilyn Kenyon
• The League #10 - Born of Vengeance by Sherrilyn Kenyon
• Cloak and Silence (Maris from the League) by Sherrilyn Kenyon
• Upon the Midnight Clear (Dream-Hunter Series #2) by Sherrilyn Kenyon
• When I fall in Love by Wendy Lindstrom

Temptation's Darling by Johanna Lindsey - Johanna Lindsey has been one of my favorite authors since college. She writes historical romances and I just love all her books and her characters. She died in October 2019 and that makes me sad. No more new books from her.

So yah. I read a wide variety of types of books. Book club makes me read genres I don't normally read, so that's good. But when I want to read quick, I fall into a book from my favorite authors or romance. Now..If you'll excuse me I have 50 books to read by Dec 31, 2020.

Hello 2020!

I didn't stay up to ring in the new year last night, but while I was eating dinner I started thinking about what I thought 2020 would look like to my 25 year old self. And then I realized my 25 year old self wasn't good an dreaming up big ideas for the future. She was busy eating spaghetti O's and trying to pay rent.

25 years old would have been in 1993 for me. I started working for Microsoft in Sept of that year, leaving the family business, Boeing, behind.

Having a computer in my home wasn't a concept at all, let alone a laptop. While Bill Gates believed that one day a computer in every household was possible, I did not.

My 25 year old self probably assumed life would be a lot like it was then. I wasn't very imaginative in that way. I was an early adopter for most technology, but it never crossed my mind what the technology could be.

I sure I didn't have a mobile phone in 1993, we barely had the Internet. Dial up, Netscape or AOL...remember those days? I'm sure I wouldn't have imagined that a small handheld phone would not only act as a phone, but a camera, a place I'll tell the world what I'm doing daily, a calculator, a game player, a communicator by typing, etc. I am not sure I could live without my phone today. How did we do it?

Social media would never have occurred to me. My social media was the actual land line phone. I'd budget in long distance calls to friends. Sometimes, most of the time, I'd go way over my budget. Friends I had then we actually got together and did things. We communicated in person.

I was still recording shows on the VCR then. Wouldn't have imagined a DVR and all the channels you could watch. I had cable, but it wasn't nearly what it is now. Didn't have Food Network, Investigative Discovery, Lifetime, Oxygen, etc. I probably watched way less TV for sure.

I would not have imagined carrying a dozen or more books with me to read at any time. eBooks changed my reading life for sure. Back in the day, getting new books was "hard" for me in that I wasn't focused on going to an actual store to buy them. I didn't do the library then either. I had way more stuff going on to read. I certainly wouldn't have imagined my future self in 2020 would have ready 50+ books in 2019.

My 25 year old self had no idea what she wanted to do with her life. Her degree was Foreign Language and Literature, she wanted to be an interpreter. She couldn't pass that test. She wasn't ambitous in that she didn't want to be a CEO or anything like that. She wanted a job she enjoyed and make enough money to live comfortably. She wouldn't have imagined that in 2020 she may become a Vice President. She certainly didn't image she'd be a Director of Professional Services. She probably wouldn't have imagined ever being a Project manager and earning her PMP (Project Manager Professional certification).

I KNOW my 25 year old self would never have imagined chiming in 2020 without Mom and Dad. She would have assumed they would be here forever.

Life is very different these days. 2020 looms before me. I love the new year because it always feels like a clean slate. I have plans. I have goals. I have desires to do/complete certain things. I really want to focus on this year and finish some things I've started over the last several years.

So as you ring in the new year, think about all that has happened to you over the last decade or so. Would you have seen you life unfold the way it did? I think most of us would say no.

Birthday Eve

Here I sit all comfy and cozy thinking about the week ahead at work when suddenly I remembered tomorrow's my birthday.

I never forget my birthday. I plan for it. I plan some more. And for a little extra ... I plan a bit more. I always know what I'm going to make and what my cake or cupcakes will be.

Nothing. It's 6:48PM on the 28th and I have nothing.

So instead of thinking about that, let's talk about 2020.

A new year to me always feels like a clean slate. I have goals, I always do and they're almost always the same.

50+ books
Try new things.
Try to be healthier
Try to save...blah blah blah...

Sometimes I actually break those goals down a bit and really focus on them. They always sit in the back of my mind. Waiting. Hoping I'll fail. They never really seem like I put much thought into them. Maybe for the month of January, then all they do is mock me.

Not this year. No siree...I've got a plan. I've got a little word that will help me focus (ok two little words)

FINISH IT!

That's right. Finish it. I'm the mistress of starting things and suck at finishing things (some things anyhow). I have a laundry list of things I want to accomplish in 2020 and in order to even consider getting half of them done I need a plan. Which I'll figure out eventually. For now...here's the list of things I WANT to do in 2020.

• Travel to a new country
• Travel to a new place around Seattle
• Hike for a day
• Buy a souvenir
• Try a new cocktail
• Pay for a strangers drink or food
• Give things I don't use to charity
• Donate money to a charity
• Do a good deed with no expectations
• Pick up garbage that isn't mine
• Send flowers to someone
• Go on a road trip
• Get a massage
• Go for a walk on a beach
• Watch a sunrise
• Watch a sunset
• Do a self-guided tour in a city
• Quit drinking for a month… hahahah
• Try 10 new restaurants
• Go to Space Needle for dinner/lunch
• Go to the movies
• Read 50 books
• Smash my "honey do list" (that alone is worth 30 items)
• Ride the ferry
• Buy a new piece of furniture
• Complete all the online courses I've bought
• Set an exercise goal each month
• Learn to meditate
• Make a new friend
• Watch a TV series you've been waiting to see
• Complete you movie watching list
• Hand write letters to Aunt Jean & Godma
• Finish your scrapbooking projects that you've started
• Clean out and organize your photos
• Review/revise the Will
• Save 20% more than this year
• Change ONE of your bad habits
• Book a date with friends you never see enough of or haven't seen in forever
• Bake a low carb treat every month
• Visit MOHAI
• Go to Eagle Landing (Burien)
• Go to Seattle Aquarium
• Visit NW Trek
• Visit Tillicum Village
• Go to the top of the Columbia Tower
• Go Wine Tasting at least 10 times
• Give your digital live a good cleaning (music collection, org documents, unsubscribe fro emails, etc)
• Find, review and stick to your 2020 Word - "FINISH IT!"
• Read the "management" and "leadership" books you've purchased
• Push yourself to do all these things 

Phew...I'm tired just looking at that list!

Currently...

Happy December! My favorite month. Its the month I was born (which means the month we celebrate that event). It's the end of a year. It's the holiday season and everyone seems jolly.

I put up a tree this year and that's helping with my jolly side. The cats, however, are systematically taking it down. I've decided for next year, as a fun game, I'm going to use my tree as an advent calendar. Every time the demons knock one off, I'm putting it away. Then by the time Christmas shows up my tree should be bare and I can just put it away.

Ok, so the other part of this time of year that I love is a new year is coming. A new year means new beginnings to me. I have a list. A very long list for sure. I'll write about that later. But in doing my list I thought about what was happening currently, so I thought I'd write about that. So get a cup of coffee and have a look.

Currently Reading: My goal this year was 50 books. I'm reading book 49 right now. If I keep these last two short I can just make my goal. I'm shooting for 50 again next year.

Currently Eating: Still eating Low Carb - ish. I feel off the wagon a bit - well a lot lately. But I'm back to visiting my nutritionist. Back to personal trainer. And back to planning my weekly meals.

Currently Listening to: Christmas Music of all kinds. My most recent favorite is for King & Country Little Drummer Boy. I was introduced to this last year and it's quickly became my favorite.

Currently Watching: The Gilmore Girls, and The Girl More Girls A Year in the Life. The TV did a marathon of Gilmore Girls and I watched all 7 seasons. Then I had to see the latest. The Year in the Life was not great. But I do love me some Gilmore Girls.

Currently Making: Cookies. Tomorrow is the great bit December Cookie Exchange and so I have to make me some cookies.

Currently Feeling: Focused. Working on my plan for 2020 and feeling really focused on it all.

Currently Planning: 2020! It's almost here and I've got a lot to do.

Currently Loving: Traveler's Notebooks. I'm almost done converting all my 12X12 scrapbooks to smaller Traveler's Notebooks. I love the new format and it's been fun reviewing all the years of work.

Happy... it's been a while

I promise myself that I'm going to blog more and then a month or more goes by and I realize my promise is nothing by empty promises.

Let's see, when we last spoke I had just dropped 23 lbs. Which I'm very proud of. What I'm not proud of is that since then I've gained 2 back. In fact, I fluctuate between down 23 and down 19. My focus has been off and I really need to find that motivation again. I'm almost there. Though it seems every time I get motivated a trip or a holiday seem to happen and I use that as an excuse to eat carbs. I've invited carbs back into my life too often now and I need to get a handle on that ASAP.

In early November, the fam went to see Wings Over Washington in downtown Seattle. It's a ride where you are pretend hang gliding over Washington. I had ridden one at California Adventure and loved it. This one, I didn't love. I didn't love the falling feeling and the floating feeling. It's beautiful scenery for sure. I'm glad we did it, but don't feel the need to do it again.

Following that we did the Seattle Great Wheel too. We've done it before with Mom, and I enjoyed it just as much this time as last.

Right now I'm sitting on a deck chair in Gold Beach Oregon watching the waves roll in and out. I'm here with a couple of Scrappy Girlfriends. We rented a beach house (Air BnB) for a long weekend of scrapping. It's such a beautiful area and the house is perfect for hanging out and scrapping. The beach is literally right out the back door.

We found this amazing little Mexican restaurant here in Gold Beach. So amazing we've gone twice. The food is so authentic and so delicious that I would probably eat there every other day if I lived here.

Gold Beach is an interesting little town. It reminds me of Ocean Shores, just more...um...conservative, let's say. The streets definitely roll up at night and you're hard pressed to see anyone on the streets unless they're leaving the local tavern. It's quiet and peaceful and really a nice little get away. We've enjoyed ourselves so much we're talking about coming back next year.

So let's see, since last I checked in .. what else has happened?

A couple of wine tasting adventures
A couple of book clubs (our drinking group with a reading problem)
A couple of Keg family dinners
A couple of Sunday dinners
A whole lot of work
A trip to Charlotte for work (Leadership class that I loved)
And a dinner with a long time friend we've not seen in 20 years.

Every once in a while I like to search through Facebook on friends from the past to see if any of them have accounts. Reconnecting seems to be something I am doing these days. So one Saturday night I typed in a friend from college's name. He's a guy whom Sherrie and I and another friend hung out with all the time. He was a ton of fun and such a part of our lives. Then marriage and kids happened...and well, we know that story all too well.

Anyhow, I stumbled on to his wife's account. It was pretty clear she wasn't an avid Facebooker, but I thought I'd send her a message just in case she ever checked in. Turns out the following week she checked in. We got to talking getting together and suddenly we had a date on the calendar where we'd all meet for dinner.

A couple of Sunday's ago they came over to my place and we got all caught up. It was great to see Mark and Diane after 20 years. So much has happened in 20 years ... it's crazy.

So there you go...that's a quick check in of what's been what in my life. Not a whole lot, but it's something. Now if you'll excuse me, I'm going to get back to scrapping.

23

Officially down 23 lbs.  I feel fantastic. My goal of 25 lbs was by Oct 9th (according to LoseIt that is. I told them my first goal and it told me based on my calorie intake, exercise plan etc how long to hit that goal.) I'm so close.

There are a number of inches that are also gone - which is almost more important than the weight in my opinion. I've been noticing dumb things (correction, they aren't dumb they just may not seem as much of a big deal to an average size person as they do to me) too. Like, chairs.

You know those chairs in waiting rooms that are really uncomfortable? My ass and hips rarely fit in them comfortably. It's always been snug. I've noticed some at work where I fit in them just fine. No longer feeling like I'm going to need baby oil to get me out of them.

I fit into the airplane seat without putting the arm rest up too. And I put on my seatbelt in the plane without asking for an extender. THAT's huge for me. It's always been shameful to me to have to ask, but I had to. This trip to Boston I didn't even have to suck it in for the seat belt to fit.

I met with my nutritionist today and we had a good laugh over my averages for the last 6 weeks. He wants me between 50-70 grams of carbs and 110 grams of protein. My averages while on vacation were 109 g carbs and 50 protein. Completely swapped. Yet, I managed to lose 5 lbs in those 6 weeks since I last saw him.

I stopped taking phentermine too. It was causing my heart to race and it wasn't good. He told me that since it's a stimulant that it does sometimes do that when a person has been on it for 4 months or so. In fact it's been about that for me. So I stopped taking it early Sept and I haven't even noticed.

What I have noticed is I can poop again (sorry TMI), I can sleep again and I'm not having the leg cramps I've had. So I think it's better that I'm off it.

So now what? If I hit my goal by Oct 9th (and a good chance I will), what next? Easy...another 25 lbs. And I need to get my blood work done again to see if my diabetes number went down. I'm sure it has...but I need to confirm it.

It feels good. Did I mention that?

Boston

The fam went to Boston to walk the 3day, and as we do, we decided to be tourists for a couple of days. My intent was to write while we were there, but I didn't. So now that we're home I'm going to give it a shot to remember what we did. 

We left Seattle on the 2nd (Memorial Day). Flying to the east coast takes all day and so we didn't get there until well after 8pm. Our mission was to do and see and do some more. The best part of taking off... this low carb thing made two things possible on the airplane. 

1. I fit comfortably in the seat without pulling up the arm rest
2. I didn't need an extender for the seat belt

Both those things bug the crap out of me when I travel and now that I've lost weight, traveling is comfortable again. 

We flew JetBlue for the first time. I gotta say...I loved them. I'd fly them again. 

Day 1 - Sept 3
The first order of business was to check out the breakfast at the hotel. Nothing overly exciting but it's nice having a free breakfast. It not only cuts down on cost, but time. If you have to go eat breakfast somewhere every day you lost time. Eating in the hotel before you leave...piece of cake. 

We knew the one thing we absolutely wanted to do was the hop on hop off trolley. We do these type of tours every where we go. It's the best way to really see the city and decide what you want to go and see more of. But to get there we had to take the Transit to downtown Boston. 

The "T" as it's called is super easy to navigate. Once you get your ticket, the documentation every where made it easy to figure out where we were going. The shuttle driver from the hotel gave us the stop we needed and off we went. 

We exited the T into the Boston Common. It was HOT and MUGGY. 80F with 89% humidity...Lord.  I'm sure I lost 50 lbs in sweat that day. it was somewhat miserable to be honest. 

After spending the bulk of the morning and early afternoon on the trolley seeing the sights of Boston, we stopped at Quincy Market to find a bit of lunch. Quick to decide we stopped at Ned Devine's.  I had "chowdah" and y'all...the best chowdah I've ever had. I got no photos of it because I inhaled it too quickly. 

Today was also Janet's birthday. We didn't do much celebrating during the day but after we got back to the hotel, we took her to dinner at the Blarney Stone - looked up restaurants in the area of our hotel and found this. 

I was still delusional that I was going to stay on my low carb plan for vacation (despite the chowder earlier) and had these fantastic steak tips. They came with mashed potatoes and Brussel sprouts. I didn't eat either.  This would be the last of me really focusing on staying low carb. Didn't last too long. It's hard when you travel. 

Day 2 - Sept 4

Same as Day 1. We took the T to Boston Common. Only today was all about the Freedom Trail. 

We used the hop on hop off trolley to get to the beginning of the trail at Bunker hill. We walked and walked and walked…then we stopped to have lunch in Little Italy. Fantastic pizza.

But the best part was after when we stopped at Mike's Bakery. We'd seen the boxes all over and wondered what it was all about. Cannoli…that's what it was all about. We swung and all got one. Janet and I split a chocolate mousse one. OH….MY…GOD…I have never tasted anything as good. It was so not sweet and so flavorful. In fact, we were so entranced in eating it we almost walked right past Paul Revere's house…

After we came down from our sugar high, we continued a bit more on the trail. Eventually we had to get back to the hotel because we were headed to my nephew Danny's house for dinner.

Driving out there was an adventure. These drivers here are insane. Lanes are really guidelines. As are traffic lights apparently. Super aggressive drivers who all seem to understand some unspoken rule about traffic "laws" being just guidelines. In fact, the only time they really honk is if the light has turned and you haven't already started going BEFORE it turned. 

On our way out there we saw a thunder storm starting to roll in. As we got closer we saw lightening and heard thunder pretty regularly. Then driving into their driveway we walked into the house and literally the clouds opened up. Two LOUD lighting/thunder strikes happened within feet of his house. The downpour was impressive. Then about 3 minutes later it was gone and it was sunny again.

Danny and his husband Keith entertained us and fed us empenadas and crostini with mozarella and tomatoes on it. Both delicious. Little Lenora was a doll. So enjoyed spending time with them. My thought the entire time is Mom would have been in heaven. She wouldn't have wanted to see anything in Boston she only would have wanted to spend it with Danny and Lenora. 

Day 3 - Sept 5

Today was all about finishing up the freedom trail. We started at Boston Common and walked the second half. During that time we stopped at the state house and had a tour of the building. Impressive for sure. Some beautiful architecture to be sure. Our tour guide was awesome.  Total Boston accent. In fact he said "horse" three times before I understood what he was saying. 

Afterwards, we walked down the street to Beantown Pub and had lunch. Clam chowdah again, along with a side of boston baked beans that were disgusting. Blech. Thank god I ordered the deep fried pickles too. The chowder was good, but not as good as Ned Devine's.

Janet had two funny sayings during lunch that had me in stitches...

"Can I dip my spoon in your chowdah?" and "Anyone want this big pickle?" I don't know why both struck my funny bone, but they did.

After that we visited one of the oldest cemeteries and it's where all the patriot were buried. I love old graveyards and what not. This one did not disappoint. 

We noticed many of the tombstones had a skeleton head and wings behind it. It was, apparently, depicting something but we had no idea what. I had to do some research to find out. 

Turns out...they're called "death heads" 

"A death's head, often with wings and/or crossed bones, was a stylized skull. Some have speculated that winged skulls were intended to symbolize a combination of physical death and spiritual regeneration. ... The death's head, a non-religious symbol was the first imagery employed in gravestone carving."

Now you know...

After that Lori and Janet were in full 3day mode so we left them there and Kathy and I headed back to the hotel.

Except on our way, we had to see ONE more stop on the freedom trail and while it was being renovated it gave Kathy and excuse to go get more cannoli from Mike's. I hung out in Faneuli plaza and watched people. We decided to take the metro from there. Which had us taking the orange line to the red line. While trying to find the orange line I swear it felt like we were walking to the downtown crossing to get the red line. In fact, by the time we did get the orange line, it was just one stop down for the red line.

The 3Day - Fri through Sun

The next three days were all about the 3day. Boston is NOT a place to try to stalk. So Kathy and I found the cheering stations and cheered from there. 

The closing was fantastic. The park was very cool. 

After we all headed to No Name Restaurant for some seafood. Interesting little restaurant. It was recommended by many of the trolley drivers. It was good, but not a place I'd have to go back to. 

Post 3 day Janet, Kathy and I were spending Monday and Tuesday seeing a few more sights around the Boston area. 

Monday Sept 9 was all about Salem. The BEST part about Salem was that my good friend from my childhood Christy joined us. She and her family live in Webster and she met us at the hotel and road with us to Salem. 

Salem wasn't what I expected. For some reason I had in my head it's just a historic little town and nothing else. We took the trolley around town to see the sights. We didn't get much about the Witch trials. We didn't have time to go into the museum which bummed me out a bit, but I was tired and I didn't want to have everyone wait for me. 

We ate at the Tavern on the Green - supposedly the best burger in town. It was good, but wasn't the "best" in my opinion. 

Tuesday, Sept 10 we headed to Cape Cod

It was so freaking beautiful. Well, Cape Cod is the land mass, the towns we stopped at were Hyannis and Provincetown (P Town). We drove around Hyannis to see the mansions and the Kennedy compound. Amazing. None could we afford and most guest houses were bigger than our houses. Impressive. 

We stopped at this little Cafe called Wimpy's for lunch. Again...more fantastic chowder. I had fried shrimp too - which I can't resist ever. 

We continued driving around the cape and ended up at the very tip top of the "toe" of the boot. Walked onto the beach and dipped our toes in the sea...well Kathy and Janet did. My delicate little feet were not happy about the sand/rock combo. 

So that's that. The Boston trip. I really didn't want to go because work was so chaotic and I hated leaving the team down one soul...but it all worked out. I got a chance to do a lot of thinking about work and came to some good decisions that put me in a good place now. 

Next trip...well I'm heading to Gold Beach in November for a scrapbooking thing with my scrap peeps. 

My Give A Damn...

It may or may not be busted. Jury's still out.

What

A

Week

I knew work life would become very chaotic and I knew it would mean more hours and I was basically ok with that. I still had hope. I still saw a future that a new CEO would change a few things. I believed in the hope from my leadership and other people around you.

But...

When I witnessed my foundation show the smallest, well rather large actually, crack this week I felt that small glimmer of hope I had had been snuffed out. I had been riding this wave of hope on someone else's surf board.

What to do now?

On Tuesday I would have told you I was going to move on. Despite how much I love my job, and the people I work with, I didn't have any hope, all I had was despair...and I felt like I was at the bottom of the pit.

Tuesday evening I updated my resume. I did some searches on the Internet for jobs. Found nothing, found some that were meh...but didn't do anything.

Wednesday I ran into a colleague at the water cooler. He asked how my day was and I responded by saying, "It's only 10am...we'll see".

Then he began to tell me a story...seemingly not related to my comment. He tells me that he and his wife get this email that's a photo of the day and it comes with a story behind the photo.  He remembers one where the photo was of a man in the sulfur pits who's job was bringing the sulfur from the volcano crater out to be processed and sold. He was covered in grime. Noxious gases all around him. Over his shoulders was a large log and on the ends were the buckets of sulfur. He was climbing out of the crater with this load.

Then he said that this guys best day looked worse than any day my colleague had had. Which he followed with "It's all about perspective."

Huh...a lesson at the water cooler.

It is about perspective. And it is about attitude. And most the times I'm content with how things are at work and how I deal with them. With the last two weeks and the insanity around the RIFs I think it finally got to me. I finally felt defeated enough to have myself a small pity party. And you know what? I'm ok with that. I know I have choices around whether I stay or leave? And I know that many friends and family don't understand why I stay (sometimes I don't either). But the truth is, I still love my job. I still love the people I work with. Do I wish things were different/better? Yes. Will they get better? Don't know. Am I willing to stay and find out? Yep.

I'm not naive in thinking that this new CEO could come in and not do wonderful things. It could still suck more than not suck. I'm willing to give him a chance, a real chance and try to be open minded about what he's about. I have a deadline in my head that will be the point in which I determine my future there. But in the meantime, I'm going to practice thinking about perspective and how different it is for every one of us.

I'm not mining sulfur. So I guess this is a good day.

Life just gets more crazier

For many years I've said my life theme song is Crazy Train by Ozzy Osbourne. It seems fitting. There are days where life isn't that crazy, and then there are days where, well, life just sucks.

Its been a rough couple of weeks at work and crazy is putting it mildly. I'd love to say it isn't going to get any crazier, but I fear if just may for a month or so. I still love what I do and enjoy all the people I work with, so that's helpful. But sometimes business decisions make work not so fun or easy.

The stress of work has often sent me into a tailspin with eating. I'm a stress and emotional eater. The more stressed I am, the more I want convenience, the more likely I am to eat fast food. You add any emotion into that mix and it's a horrible combination.

My go to has always been food. Food will save me. Food will make it all better. Food will alleviate the stress. 

Turns out...that's not true. I know! Shocking.

Food will save me, but not the type of food that used to save me. I had three nights last week where I left work late and all I wanted to do was swing into XYZ fast food joint and make dinner easy. I argued with myself all the way home about the options. I told myself lies like, "Just swing into the teriyaki place and just get chicken." I knew I wouldn't. I knew my emotions would yell and scream to get the chicken, rice and gyoza. Surely once I ate that I'd feel better. And I might...for a moment.

Each night the health won. Each night I managed to convince myself that the best thing I could do for myself and my emotions is to stay on plan. If I didn't, it would be ONE more stress that I'd be adding to myself. It wasn't worth it.

I also just discovered that I think I have to give up my Sunday treat of the Starbucks Ham and Cheese croissant. I love these. But my stomach really doesn't. This is the second Sunday in a row that I've gotten one and the second Sunday in a row that I feel gross and can't be too far from the facilities. On the plus side it's cleaning me out. But nope...I think it has to go.

I need bread of some type in my life, so I'm stepping out and trying all sorts of recipes that are low carb. So far it's been hit or miss on how good it us, but I'm convinced I'll find something that works. Today I'm making ranch crackers.