Its sad that at my age...which is only 36, that I'm excited about a weekend in which I have really nothing planned. Dinner with some friends tomorrow night, but otherwise...I get to do nothing. How exciting is that? It got me to thinking about this next weekend though in which I have a dilemna.
Next weekend, Sherrie, Mike and I have the Top 10 Worst song party with a local band that I am so in love with (okay, I'm really just in love with the lead singer. I'll tell the story sometime of the Valentine party he sang to me at...my wittle heart went pitter pat)...The Dudley Manlove Quartet. Every year, for the past 10 years, they do this show the weekend before Halloween. The idea is that these "Top 10 Worst" songs are voted on by the fans. Each year I've mad an attempt to get a REALLY bad song into the top 10. Last year I was successful with PacMan Fever. One year they did Baby Got Back, which was pretty funny seeing 6 white guys singing. Its a bad song. It deserves to be there. This year I voted religiously for Barbie Girl by Aqua and I'm Too Sexy for My Shirt by Right Said Fred. I realized I was trying to find songs I thought it would be amusing to see 6 white guys sing. Dudley Manlove also, traditionally, dresses up like some band. The first year I saw them, they dressed up as Spinal Tap, then they were The Go-Go's, Duran Duran, Darryl Hall and the John Oats'es, and my favorit Robert Palmer and his dancing girls.
They start a count down from the top 100 songs the 1st of October. They add some "historical" commentary that's spiced with sarcastic and witty commentary. So today, I thought I'd share this with you. http://www.dudleymanlove.com/column.html
The truth be told, I'm in love with the lead singer, Paul Jensen. have I mentioned that yet? I'm a groopy (or is it groupy). I admit it.
But the point of all of this is, their show next weekend starts at around 10 PM. I'm trying to figure out how the HELL I'm going to stay awake that late. They do the top 10 worst the second set, which will start around 11:30. That is SOOOOOOO past my bed time. Any suggestions for staying awake? Aside from large amounts of coffee and a nap during the day...
Friday, October 21, 2005
Thursday, October 20, 2005
Free Speech?
So, what do you think? Do you think YOU as an individual support free speech? Do you have racism thoughts? Do you have an opinion that is yours because you've researched something or was your opinion given to you by a parent or colleague?
I got to thinking about this today when I received a response to an email that was sent out by a family member. The email basically proclaims that 86% of American's are christian's and therefore we should be allowed to have "In God We trust" on money and say the pledge of
Allegiance. Then it says, that we should tell the other 14% to shut up about it.
The response I received (because I was on the thread) said that 100% of American's believe in freedom of speech and that we should practice and respect that instead of telling everyone to shut up.
Is 86% of the United States really Christian? That seems extraordinarily high. But maybe.
What I don't get is, who really cares? I'm a spiritual person. Lutheran by baptism, but not a practicing religious person (aka I don't attend church). But I don't think that this is such a big deal about saying the pledge or whether our money says In God We Trust.
The very basis of the United States is that we are a melting pot. We "accept" all cultures and embrace the differences. At least that's what I was taught. But more and more I see so much intolerance for people of different races, religions, political beliefs etc. And I have to admit, I'm as guilty as the next person sometimes with regards to thinking things about certain races that I probably shouldn't think.
I spent a lot of time outside this country. And in situations where, as an American, we weren't exactly treated greatly. And I think by spending so much time in other cultures (Saudi ARabia, Mexico, Italy, Switzerland, etc) that there's a certain amount of understanding for other cultures. I like the idea of a multicultural environment. It opens your eyes to other aspects and lifestyles, etc.
With all that being said, I get frustrated about some cultures like a lot of people to. I make rash judgments about a group based on a few bad apples. But I could never imagine myself doing something against the other group just because they are different from me.
I'm not sure how I got on racism when I was talking about free speech, but just pretend I'm a politician ... and I'm talking in circles.
If you've not seen the movie Crash, I highly recommend it. It has some very eye opening situations in it that makes you stop and think about how you, and an american, or as a person who might be white, or who might be rich, etc react to situations.
I got to thinking about this today when I received a response to an email that was sent out by a family member. The email basically proclaims that 86% of American's are christian's and therefore we should be allowed to have "In God We trust" on money and say the pledge of
Allegiance. Then it says, that we should tell the other 14% to shut up about it.
The response I received (because I was on the thread) said that 100% of American's believe in freedom of speech and that we should practice and respect that instead of telling everyone to shut up.
Is 86% of the United States really Christian? That seems extraordinarily high. But maybe.
What I don't get is, who really cares? I'm a spiritual person. Lutheran by baptism, but not a practicing religious person (aka I don't attend church). But I don't think that this is such a big deal about saying the pledge or whether our money says In God We Trust.
The very basis of the United States is that we are a melting pot. We "accept" all cultures and embrace the differences. At least that's what I was taught. But more and more I see so much intolerance for people of different races, religions, political beliefs etc. And I have to admit, I'm as guilty as the next person sometimes with regards to thinking things about certain races that I probably shouldn't think.
I spent a lot of time outside this country. And in situations where, as an American, we weren't exactly treated greatly. And I think by spending so much time in other cultures (Saudi ARabia, Mexico, Italy, Switzerland, etc) that there's a certain amount of understanding for other cultures. I like the idea of a multicultural environment. It opens your eyes to other aspects and lifestyles, etc.
With all that being said, I get frustrated about some cultures like a lot of people to. I make rash judgments about a group based on a few bad apples. But I could never imagine myself doing something against the other group just because they are different from me.
I'm not sure how I got on racism when I was talking about free speech, but just pretend I'm a politician ... and I'm talking in circles.
If you've not seen the movie Crash, I highly recommend it. It has some very eye opening situations in it that makes you stop and think about how you, and an american, or as a person who might be white, or who might be rich, etc react to situations.
Wednesday, October 19, 2005
Be Afraid!
Do you ever wonder why people send you emails with disgusting pictures on it? Or worse, why do we laugh at the disgusting pictures? Well, wonder no more. Now you'll need to wonder why I'm going to post these disgusting pictures... because they're freakin' hilarious. Enjoy!
Monday, October 17, 2005
What's in a skidmark?
So every now and then myself and a couple other smart ass types here get on an email subject that we just can't kill. This particular day, we were discussing skidmarks. Here's the email that started this conversation.
Sent: October 6, 2005
Reply 1 from SmartAss 1: Sent October 17, 2006
Skidmark Alert: Numerous micro-skids were located at 10:23A on October 17 in the downstairs bathroom by the back entrance. I was not able to identify the author, despite the unusual dispersal pattern of the micro-skid distribution. Using the color analysis swatches from my handy SIK (skidmark investigation kit), I determined the samples fell somewhere between PANTONE 19-1020 Dark Earth and PANTONE 17-1134 Brown Sugar. My color-blindness interferes with an accurate assessment, but I did the best I could. I did make the appropriate notations in my skidmark log. I’m issuing this formal BOL (be on lookout) notification for the culprit.
Reply 2 from SmartAss 1: Sent 10 minutes after Reply 1:
Skidmark Investigation Update:
Following the instructions in my skidmark field guide, I have completed the initial ballistics testing and physical analysis. First, I attempted to classify the missing pellet using evidence available from the impromptu “pro tempore” skidmark analysis. Lacking sufficient evidence to quantify shape and taper, I will loosely classify this pellet as “elliptical or oblong”. I can not rule out the very real possibility that we are dealing with an E unum pluribus (out of one, many) scenario involving multiple pellets. I have concluded that the pellet(s) in question contained mostly dark pigments, the color was mottled, and since the skidmarks themselves were so narrow, I infer that the firmness of the projectile(s) was not loose, and would be more appropriately classified at the “solid” end of the scale.
Since we are operating with imperfect and incomplete information, I was forced to move directly to more sophisticated assessment techniques. My initial objective was to uncover any “low hanging fruit” as it were, that might help to limit the scope of the investigation. I was hoping to get lucky and make a “falsus in uno, falsus in omnibus” claim (false in one, false in all), but the limited evidence did not support this effort.
Next, I searched for any unusual class characteristic parameters that might illustrate a potential mismatch between pellet and bore indicating the pellet was launched manually or by a third party. I have assumed for the time being, we are dealing with a standard delivery vehicle and bore, and will ignore non-standard (smooth bore) tests for the time being. Lacking any evidence of forced exit, I will also stipulate this pellet was induced naturally without physical or pharmaceutical assistance. In an attempt to identify evidence of unique land and groove marks in the “barrel”, I examined the skidmark patterns for any correlation to pellets launched from known striated and non-striated bores with no success. Analysis of the skidmark pattern also rules out the chance this was let loose by an abnormally undersized barrel. The possibility of release from an unusually oversized bore remains a distinct possibility. If I can find the time, I’ll look for evidence of any deceptive striations or unusual chamber marks.
I’m also going to recommend increased surveillance in case we’re dealing with a serial marker. We like to refer to multiple offenders as “taggers”, and increased surveillance greatly magnifies the chances of us catching the offender flagrante delicto (red-handed).
Response to Reply 2 from SmartAss 2:
Measurement of the macro-hardness of materials is a quick and simple method of obtaining mechanical property data for the bulk material from a small sample. It is also widely used for the quality control of surface treatments processes. However, when concerned with coatings and surface properties of importance to friction and wear processes for instance, the macro-indentation depth would be too large relative to the surface-scale features.
The End! Welcome to my world!
Sent: October 6, 2005
Reply 1 from SmartAss 1: Sent October 17, 2006
Skidmark Alert: Numerous micro-skids were located at 10:23A on October 17 in the downstairs bathroom by the back entrance. I was not able to identify the author, despite the unusual dispersal pattern of the micro-skid distribution. Using the color analysis swatches from my handy SIK (skidmark investigation kit), I determined the samples fell somewhere between PANTONE 19-1020 Dark Earth and PANTONE 17-1134 Brown Sugar. My color-blindness interferes with an accurate assessment, but I did the best I could. I did make the appropriate notations in my skidmark log. I’m issuing this formal BOL (be on lookout) notification for the culprit.
Reply 2 from SmartAss 1: Sent 10 minutes after Reply 1:
Skidmark Investigation Update:
Following the instructions in my skidmark field guide, I have completed the initial ballistics testing and physical analysis. First, I attempted to classify the missing pellet using evidence available from the impromptu “pro tempore” skidmark analysis. Lacking sufficient evidence to quantify shape and taper, I will loosely classify this pellet as “elliptical or oblong”. I can not rule out the very real possibility that we are dealing with an E unum pluribus (out of one, many) scenario involving multiple pellets. I have concluded that the pellet(s) in question contained mostly dark pigments, the color was mottled, and since the skidmarks themselves were so narrow, I infer that the firmness of the projectile(s) was not loose, and would be more appropriately classified at the “solid” end of the scale.
Since we are operating with imperfect and incomplete information, I was forced to move directly to more sophisticated assessment techniques. My initial objective was to uncover any “low hanging fruit” as it were, that might help to limit the scope of the investigation. I was hoping to get lucky and make a “falsus in uno, falsus in omnibus” claim (false in one, false in all), but the limited evidence did not support this effort.
Next, I searched for any unusual class characteristic parameters that might illustrate a potential mismatch between pellet and bore indicating the pellet was launched manually or by a third party. I have assumed for the time being, we are dealing with a standard delivery vehicle and bore, and will ignore non-standard (smooth bore) tests for the time being. Lacking any evidence of forced exit, I will also stipulate this pellet was induced naturally without physical or pharmaceutical assistance. In an attempt to identify evidence of unique land and groove marks in the “barrel”, I examined the skidmark patterns for any correlation to pellets launched from known striated and non-striated bores with no success. Analysis of the skidmark pattern also rules out the chance this was let loose by an abnormally undersized barrel. The possibility of release from an unusually oversized bore remains a distinct possibility. If I can find the time, I’ll look for evidence of any deceptive striations or unusual chamber marks.
I’m also going to recommend increased surveillance in case we’re dealing with a serial marker. We like to refer to multiple offenders as “taggers”, and increased surveillance greatly magnifies the chances of us catching the offender flagrante delicto (red-handed).
Response to Reply 2 from SmartAss 2:
Measurement of the macro-hardness of materials is a quick and simple method of obtaining mechanical property data for the bulk material from a small sample. It is also widely used for the quality control of surface treatments processes. However, when concerned with coatings and surface properties of importance to friction and wear processes for instance, the macro-indentation depth would be too large relative to the surface-scale features.
The End! Welcome to my world!
Happy Monday!
Hope everyone had a good weekend. Mom was in town so we shopped and shopped and shopped. Oh and we ate some too.
So, I sent a note to a few sarcastic friends to ask for ideas for writing. I have to say, they came through as I thought they would with interesting, a bit amusing, and down right outlandish ideas.
1. Places you've traveled that has has the most impact on you. NOT where you've drank the most.
2. Why ___ ? Nothing else, but why?
3. Why Washington is the real Washington over Washington DC
4. How much wood would a wood chuck chuck? Do the math!
5. Scientology
6. The morale delimnas of the world.
So, while all very good conversational pieces, I think I'll pass on most of them for now. Though writing about a wood chuck could be interesting.
If you've got any idea, let me hear them.
BTW - 69 more shopping days until Christmas.
PS - In case you're wondering, the deleted comments are not deleted because of the content, while amuse, but rather because its SPAM. I hate SPAM, in any way shape or form.
So, I sent a note to a few sarcastic friends to ask for ideas for writing. I have to say, they came through as I thought they would with interesting, a bit amusing, and down right outlandish ideas.
1. Places you've traveled that has has the most impact on you. NOT where you've drank the most.
2. Why ___ ? Nothing else, but why?
3. Why Washington is the real Washington over Washington DC
4. How much wood would a wood chuck chuck? Do the math!
5. Scientology
6. The morale delimnas of the world.
So, while all very good conversational pieces, I think I'll pass on most of them for now. Though writing about a wood chuck could be interesting.
If you've got any idea, let me hear them.
BTW - 69 more shopping days until Christmas.
PS - In case you're wondering, the deleted comments are not deleted because of the content, while amuse, but rather because its SPAM. I hate SPAM, in any way shape or form.
Thursday, October 13, 2005
Wow...look at me....day 2
So I thought last night about what I would write about in my blog. And I realized, sadly, that there is plenty of insanity surrounding me that I may be able to fill the blog up yet. And I realized that blogs are really about random thoughts, and well, anyone who knows me knows I have plenty of them. They rarely make sense to me, so if they make sense to you, please feel free to inform me.
Today's topic: Sarcasm.
It occurred to me yesterday, in a rather painful way, that not everyone gets sarcasm. Sarcasm is after all, my daily bread. Its part of my wiring and I can't seem to stop sarcasm. It creeps into every conversation, and almost every thought at times. Let's call it my evil twin.
First, the definition according to Webster:
Sarcasm - the use of an often ironical expression of scorn or contempt.
Irony - a linguistic device or form of humour that takes its effect from stating or implying the opposite of what is the case or what is intended, eg saying 'You've made a really good job of that, haven't you', when someone has done something badly.
You really see sarcasm every where these days. Its in TV, its in music, its in almost every conversation, its in the news...let's face it....it's everywhere. Have we become so calloused and numb to our surroundings that the only way to deal with it is by sarcasm?
Top 3 Places best not to use sarcasm:
1. Work - It seems most people really don't appreciate sarcasm at work. Especially when you use sarcasm mixed with "humor" in an attempt to cover an uncomfortable situation.
2. Dates - Especially the first date. You need to first determine if the other person in the date understands and appreciates sarcasm. If they don't, then you end up looking like an idiot. I've been there...I've witnessed that look of total confusion from the other person.
3. Church - Do I really need to comment on this? I'm sure God doesn't appreciate sarcasm.
I held an official survey here at work to ask people what they thought sarcasm meant. Here are my responses:
"As if you don't know..."
"Sarcasm, that's what we have here."
"Its a form of insult...usually bad" - I couldn't bare to tell this person that insults are rarely good...that would have been sarcastic.
"Sarcasm is a word that is used to explain irony"
"Get away from me..."
"Don't you have work to do? Oh, that's right, you do Customer care."
So, the end result here is that sarcasm is, in fact, every where. Now, what was my point?
Today's topic: Sarcasm.
It occurred to me yesterday, in a rather painful way, that not everyone gets sarcasm. Sarcasm is after all, my daily bread. Its part of my wiring and I can't seem to stop sarcasm. It creeps into every conversation, and almost every thought at times. Let's call it my evil twin.
First, the definition according to Webster:
Sarcasm - the use of an often ironical expression of scorn or contempt.
Irony - a linguistic device or form of humour that takes its effect from stating or implying the opposite of what is the case or what is intended, eg saying 'You've made a really good job of that, haven't you', when someone has done something badly.
You really see sarcasm every where these days. Its in TV, its in music, its in almost every conversation, its in the news...let's face it....it's everywhere. Have we become so calloused and numb to our surroundings that the only way to deal with it is by sarcasm?
Top 3 Places best not to use sarcasm:
1. Work - It seems most people really don't appreciate sarcasm at work. Especially when you use sarcasm mixed with "humor" in an attempt to cover an uncomfortable situation.
2. Dates - Especially the first date. You need to first determine if the other person in the date understands and appreciates sarcasm. If they don't, then you end up looking like an idiot. I've been there...I've witnessed that look of total confusion from the other person.
3. Church - Do I really need to comment on this? I'm sure God doesn't appreciate sarcasm.
I held an official survey here at work to ask people what they thought sarcasm meant. Here are my responses:
"As if you don't know..."
"Sarcasm, that's what we have here."
"Its a form of insult...usually bad" - I couldn't bare to tell this person that insults are rarely good...that would have been sarcastic.
"Sarcasm is a word that is used to explain irony"
"Get away from me..."
"Don't you have work to do? Oh, that's right, you do Customer care."
So, the end result here is that sarcasm is, in fact, every where. Now, what was my point?
Wednesday, October 12, 2005
What the...?
How'd I get a blog? I'm a techy geek, but a blog? Me? Surely I dont' have enough exciting things to chat about...but I've read other blogs and well, apparently you can write about just about anything you want. So here it goes.
First and foremost, a disclaimer. I do not hold myself responsible for anything that is written in the blog, or anything that might be misspelled. Yes, I know there are spell checkers, but frankly I prefer to make it interesting.
Second, what the hell am I going to blog about? Is blog a verb, noun, adjective? So many things to think about these days.
Who am I?
My name is Jennifer. I'm a Project Manager (PMP really) in Seattle who secretly hates her job. My company is a small web marketing company who's office is in an old historic, supposedly haunted church on Capital Hill in Seattle. I've not seen the ghost, but I have seen strange things go on here.
We have dogs. Yes dogs. Every day is "Bring your dog to work" day. Jordi, Spot, Emma, Maggie, Molly and the new comer Betty. Yes, I'm still talking about the 4 legged dogs (I think their actual scientific name is Puppious Loyalius - but I could be wrong). I spend at least 30 minutes a day visiting with each dog and supplying them with treats. Of course they have to do tricks to get my treats. Yes, I'm still talking about dogs. Sheesh...where's your mind?
Outside of work I spend my days reading, watching as many episodes of Smallville as I can ( Clark Kent should be married to me...but he doesn't realize it yet), hanging with friends, doing Project Mgmt classes, etc. Nothing overly exciting, but I'm sure there should be some humor in it somehow.
Who are the players?
Main players will be Sherrie my cousin, and Mike my good friend.
Occasionally, you'll hear of Mom and Dad. Mom's crazy...and me, her daughter is an apple that didn't fall far from the tree.
Occasionally, you'll hear of people at work. I'll code name them to protect the not so innocent. My current project at work is to try to not spend as much time at the receptionist desk - oh sorry the Front Office Coordinator's desk...see we're friends....but sadly people "assume" we're gossiping when we're chatting...when really all we're doing is talking about everyone one else. (That's a joke. Get it?). Well call her, Super S.
Let's see...what have I missed? Oh yes, if you have any suggestions for me to be more creative please provide them. I'm all for creative ideas.
If you have any bad comments about my writing or my life, please keep them to yourself. This is, after all, MY blog...I don't need to hear your drivel. (check the spelling on that word).
Cheers,
Jenn