Thursday, February 28, 2008

Off to the land of OZ

That's right kittens, I'm off to the great state of Arizona tomorrow. I can't wait to see the sun and feel it's warmth. Checking the weather report for the last two days, and one phone call from the MomUnit confirming it, looks like I'll be in 80 weather for 4 glorious days. From 45 to 80 in just 2.5 hours. I can't wait. I am in need of some serious vitamin D.

My mom's family is having a reunion. I've not seen some of these family members for like 15 or 20 years. Crazy. It shocks me how quickly time passes. I was just saying to PMDude today that I don't even remember yesterday. It came and went before I could store it in my long term memory. Did I even do work? Never mind. Don't answer that.

I plan on doing some walking in the land of Oz. It'll be nice and warm, so there's no excuse. And BigBro was nice enough to provide me a map of a walk he did down there. So I really have no excuse.

While I was working out this afternoon I watched Judge Judy. I think I've mentioned before that this show cracks me up. It proves over and over that the gene pools out there need some chlorine. Anyhow, a sister from the south, and I mean the "south" was suing her sister for wrecking her car. The defendant sister's excuse was she hit a deer and so it wasn't her fault. Judge Judy asked her if she called animal control to come get the deer. The sister said no. Judge Judy asked what she did with the deer. The sister said she ate it. She ate it! Now practically I see the point, but good grief only in the south.

Tuesday, February 26, 2008

A little this! A little that!

Because I can't figure out what else to write about and yet feel the need to feed the blog world with useless and meaningless ramblings.

The roommate (aka The Big Black Beast of Burden aka Pookie) has suddenly found that he "needs" to charge the sliding glass door every time this particularly cute grey cat comes around. Now it could be a female cat and there for he's "hungry" for her (though he's fixed and doubtful even knows what that is). Or it's a male kitty and he's protecting Chez Jenn's. Either way he needs to stop. I have cat face prints on the glass and his little kitty brain is being jolted out of place. And by "charge" I mean he's all the way across the apartment and runs at full speed to the glass, and only stops when his face hits the glass full on. The other issue is he does it in the middle of the night. Being startled awake by the sound of a 14 lb cat hitting a solid glass door through vertical blinds, is not my idea of fun. It must stop. I'm going to duct tape the cat to the ceiling to stop said issue.

Skippy was absent from work yesterday. What a glorious Monday. He had a "chest" thing and felt he couldn't make it into work. Now keep in mind, my work ethic, and PMDude's too, says that if I'm not dead, and am home sick, I still do "work". He was sadly at work today and didn't sound sick at all. He spent 3/4 of the day today whining about how he feels "okay" but is just so tired. He's so very tired. All day I wanted to say, "I'm so f****** tired of listing to you whine." But I didn't. I refrained, barely.

Am I the only one who hates the Oscars? I would like to request a shortened version please. Just show me the nominees, the winners and move on to the next category. I hate the thank you speeches. First off almost every single one thanks God and I can almost gaurantee that not a one of them have been to church in the last 5 years, nor have the likely prayed. But whatever. That's cynical girl speaking. I do love checking out the dresses the day after online. I'm always amused when the online world shows the "worst dressed" and there's a male actor listed and he's wearing a tux. A tux that looks no different than a tux worm by some other man.

A BIG HUGE SHOUT OUT TO PEGGY S for her donation. She's a friend of PMDude and someone I've never met. In fact, I've been shocked the amount of donations I've received by people I don't actually know. Friends through this blog world. These witty, clever, sarcastic, and funny friends I now am glad to have in my circle even if I've never met them.

The blisters are almost back to normal. I actually bothered them yesterday by walking a bit. Stupid Stupid girl! They hurt today and so consequently couldn't walk today. I lifted weights today instead while watch Judge Judy. What? As if you don't watch her.

Sunday, February 24, 2008

Walking, Whining, Wine, and Photography

Good day my little chickadees. I'm one pooped girl today. Oh and I have pain. Ohhhh I have pain.
Yesterday Blueberry and I walked to our own drummer for 9 miles. We did three laps of Greenlake. It was one of those awesomely sunny, just right temperature days in Seattle. Everybody and their dog (literally) was out at Greenlake. But it was so worth it. Such good people watching for one, but the fact that we did three laps. Yay us. VikingGirl got the crud that's making its rounds here in the NW, so she didn't make it.

At the end of our second lap we (read: I) was contemplating not going round again, but walking over to Jock&Jill to buy my new shoes. Finally, I decided to just do that later. I'm paying dearly for that decision. By the end of the third lap I was feeling it. Blueberry and I both could feel it in our hips, and our feet were starting to hurt. My right foot hurt more than the left. I crawled to the car and had to get to the store to buy the last bits for the wine tasting extravaganza at Chez Jenn's.

I got to the store, had to park way out - of course, because when your feet are sore, why would a parking spot be available close? Walked into Safeway, grabbed a few items and realized my debit card was back in the car. Bugger! I put my cart by the front, took baby steps back to the freakin car. Got the debit card and crawled back. Upon my return, I realized they had taken my cart and I had to start over. BuggerBugger!

Finishing that I got home. I sat my butt down on the floor and started stretching. I'm a BIG believer of stretching and lots of water after walking. It's the answer to no muscle pain. As I was on the floor I was checking out the balls of my feet. And there they were. Two blisters on the bottom of my right foot. Small, and flat. But my god they hurt. I got a lot of advice from everyone with what I should do with them. They puffed up a bit over night so I took BigBro's advice and got a needle and neosporin. The interesting thing here, in case you didn't know, is that my little tooties are very sensitive. It's hard for me to get a pedicure without being stressed. I do love pedicures, but it tickles. So popping blisters is hard - yes I can even tickle myself. But I did it, and they still hurt. I get to go out with the PhotoGods today for shooting architecture...and it's gonna hurt. Got my Aleve and I'm ready to go.

Last night's Wine Tasting was another fantastic success. We had 13 bottles of wine to choose from and taste. I tasted all but the white wines. I decided - for the first time - to not mix my wines. My body does appreciate when I do that. I made Tyler Florence's Spahetti Bolognese. YumO! OMG It's delicious. I've made it a hundred times before. It takes all day and it's yummy. I learned a lot about my friends last night. Blueberry for example likes ménage à trois. In fact just about everyone who tried it liked ménage à trois. (note: ménage à trois was a wine last night). The NewlyWeds brought a kickass appetizer, that's actually good for you too. Friends Mark and Vanessa (whom I can't think of nicknames for yet, but I'm close) brought Rice Krispie Treats. Yay Mark. Whodathunk Rice Krispie Treats would go well with red wine.
Today the PhotoGods of the NW took out in search for architecture. We found ourselves on the campus of the University of Washington. I've lived in Seattle since 1986 and have never really wondered the UW campus. (I went to the rival school, so why would I?) I gotta say, what a gorgeous campus. Full of gothic style buildings and few oddly placed "modern" buildings. We had fun and I think I got a few good shots.

Thursday, February 21, 2008

Let the Sickness Continue

So, I'm sure you've noticed, or maybe you haven't been paying attention, but Pink is apparently my new thing. I laugh at that thought really considering the MomUnit couldn't get me in pink to save her soul when I was a child. Pink was for girls, and a girly girl I wasn't.

And yet now, some 35+ years later I'm all in with Pink.

Let's review:
1 Pink Sony Camera
1 Pink DELL Laptop
1 Pink External hard drive
1 Pink wireless mouse
2 Pink water bottles
1 pink Blog
1 pink Sarcastic Ball (not to be confused with the 8Ball)
2 pink pairs of socks
1 pink Warm up jacket

And now we can add this to my growing list of pink items.
In case you have not been made aware as I was (Thanks Vicky), the iPod Shuffle is now only $49. That's a steal! Everyone should have one. Now granted it's only 1GB, but it's perfect for working out or say long distance walking (for example). And it clips onto things...which makes for easy moving. It's hot. Come on! Admit it!
In other news its freaking Thursday already. I was glad to have Monday off to celebrate President's (even though I refuse to celebrate the current one), but missing one day sure does put a PM behind. Especially when your counterparts in the UK don't have that day off.
This weekend the Saving 2nd Base team (minus BigBro who's still in Arizona) will be attempting 9 miles, with an option for 12 depending on how we fill. There won't be any hills in this trek so it's possible we could do 12. TWELVE freakin miles...wow. I never thought I'd say that in reference to me. Hah!

Monday, February 18, 2008

Destination Tully's

So yesterday I wrote of our great adventure in West Seattle and our destination being Starbucks. Well there's another sheriff in town...Tully's.



But before I get to that a few shout outs to my recent benefactors.

The Washburn Family - Jule's you're one of my longest, dearest friends. Thank you for the donation.

Patron Saint - You KICK ASS. Thank you for your donation. I feel so blessed to have "met" you, even though we've never met.

Solje - You girlfriend KICK Cougar ASS. We go way WAY back. Whodathunk during our days in college, we'd be here?

VikingGirl was responsible for today's walk. She lives on a local trail and thought it would be worth a trip to walk from her house to downtown Woodinville to Tully's and back. Round trip 6 miles. Less than we wanted to walk today, but there was a hitch. There was a hill or two, or three or four. Oh and the major hill was at the beginning again, which is good. (incidentally you see how beautiful it is here in Seattle today? Gorgeous day - a perfect day for a walk.)

The second hitch was that VikingGirl hadn't walked much past a certain point on the trail and so wasn't sure what lie ahead. We started out, and hit the hill walking. VikingGirl was my murderer on this trail. The hill was massive ...MASSIVE! But we made it to the top. Ah a plateau. But then we realized that we were walking down a hill then hitting a plateau, then down again. Suddenly it hit me that the walk home would be ALL up hill. But we walked on. Then, then we saw it. A hill. A hill that to my estimate was approximate a 30% downgrade. To be more specific, we couldn't see the bottom of the hill until we were at the top looking down.

We started down. As we walked down, we were thinking of a plan to get up the hill. How could we even consider it? We'd be out of energy by the middle, if that.

At the bottom, we zigged and we zagged and walked out off the trail into Tully's. For those not of the NW, Tully's is another coffee chain that you find on corners you don't find a Starbucks.

We got our "energy" and decided then and there that we'd call VikingGirl's nanny to come "save" us. But before that we'd might as well walk another mile or two on the Sammamish River Trail.

Next week we are aiming for 9 miles. My goal is 10 miles by the end of the month. Missing a weekend of walking puts me slightly behind. But I'm sure we can do we can do it.

Sunday, February 17, 2008

Destination Starbucks

Living in Seattle you are almost guaranteed to be able to drive by or walk by a Starbuck within minutes of each other.

I'm a Starbucks poster child. I order a very simple drink - Grande Vanilla Americano with extra room. I am guaranteed that any Starbucks I order my drink at, even the cheesy ones inside Safeway or QFC stores (not Starbuck employees usually, but store employees). Still, I get the same exact drink every time. I look forward to the consistency. I crave the consistency.

Though on occasion I like to par take in the other little coffee houses in the area who specialize in meaty coffee. These special coffee houses usually serve Vivace or something similar. Vivace is a very hearty, very bold, very heavy coffee. I swear when I drink it I feel I should be using a spoon instead of drinking it. Thick and delicious.

But I digress to why "destination Starbucks".

Yesterday, I was able to lace up my walking shoes again and hit the pavement. It had been two long weeks since I had walked - thanks to a stupid cold. I felt behind the 8 ball and delaying my training any further wasn't an option. I challenged Blueberry to chart out our course. She sent her map to us and explained a couple of different options through West Seattle. And she included that there were two Starbucks on our route! Glory days. We joked that from now on when we walk we have to make sure there's at least two Starbucks. I wonder if we can, in every course we plan, have a couple of Starbucks on...me thinks yes.

We took off and met VikingGirl (Yes, Heidi has a new code name - someday I'll take a photo and explain why) at 63rd and Admiral Way. Blueberry's course included an enormous hill. We had an option to either do an enormous hill at the beginning of the walk or the end of the walk. And she promised the "enormous" hill has some flat spots in it where we could catch our breath. I now know Blueberry's definition of "flat spot" differs greatly to my definition.

VikingGirl, Blueberry and I started off. We decided to do the hill first and get it out of our way. The Starbucks - at the top of the hill. Sneaky. Very sneaky! Blueberry knew I hadn't had coffee yet and having a Starbucks at the top was a sure fire way to get me motivated.

One foot in front of the other, we hiked up this hill. And we hiked and hiked up this hill. All the while I'm asking, "Where exactly are the flat spots?" As we marched on we'd hit a not so steep part of the hill and Blueberry would hollar back to me that we're at a flat spot. My butt it was flat.

The hill was exactly 1 mile up. And we did make it. We stopped at the top at a Safeway in which VikingGirl and I grabbed a bite to eat because neither of us had had breakfast. Dumb walkers! Oh and Safeway had a Starbucks.

We walked on through West Seattle. Stopping to take pictures every now and then at scenic view points. It was a sunny day, but a bit foggy so Seattle wasn't as in view as it normally is.

5 miles later - FIVE miles later we pass the last of the Starbucks. But by then we were too hungry and decided to have lunch instead.

On route we received 2 "atta girls" from walkers, 2 honks, and tried to take 3 puppies home with us. Total miles walked - just over 7.

Thursday, February 14, 2008

Valentine's Update: DMQ style

Imagine if you will, sitting at your desk minding your own business. When "ding" the bell out in the lobby rings. None of the people around you seem particularly interested in getting up to get it, so you drag yourself up to the reception counter (which has no receptionist) and there sitting on the counter was this:


There's a card. It's addressed to "Jenn" - why, that's me! Oh goody! I got a Valentine. A secret admirer perhaps? Perhaps its hotty boy who works down the hall who has quite the impressive back side, if you know what I mean? Oh, wait, perhaps it's from Dad for our "anniversary" that's Sunday? Or, maybe it's from ... or, I could open the card.

I carry the 14 lbs of fruit package back to my desk, imagining over and over again who could be the lucky person to have sent such a fantastically low calorie Valentine to me?

As I tear into the envelop I think, clearly it's someone who knows me because they spelled Jenn with two "N's". Wait! What? Who?


DMQ = Dudley Manlove Quartet! No way! This is Righteous! Or, is it perhaps from a certain friend/friends who happened to attend the Valentine's show with me and had such a fantastic time they felt like they HAD to reciprocate? Me thinks maybe yes. But either way...THANKS! You know who you are!

Now rereading my blog I glanced at the bouquet and I'm taken back to a Mariner's game in which they started selling chocolate dipped strawberries. Blueberry and I were watching as person after person walked by with these "things", when I blurted out, "they look like the top of a pe*is." (If you don't know what that word is, think male, think anatomy, think south of the border). After cleaning up Blueberry from spitting her drink halfway across Safeco Field, we laughed until our sides hurt. Now I find myself glancing at this bouquet and laughing at the thought of "I got a bouquet of pe*is tops." (Can't wait to see stat counter pick up this blog when someone searches on that).

Blech!


"I don't understand why Cupid was chosen to represent Valentine's Day. When I think about romance, the last thing on my mind is a short, chubby toddler coming at me with a weapon." ~Author Unknown
Need I say more?

Monday, February 11, 2008

Coughing, Achy, Stuffy head, Fever sure wish I could rest

I'm sick again. I swear I just had a cold, and suddenly I have one again. Whomever is responsible for passing this virus to me is gonna get it!

My weekend stunk to high heaven considering I didn't move from the couch. I felt a bit icky on Friday, but forced myself to go see Dudley (yes I forced myself...well maybe not). I knew I was coming down with something. I could feel it in my bones. You know that feeling when every noise sorta gets your nerves jumping. Where just lifting the glass to take a drink is painful. Yah that feeling.

The boys here hot hot hot at this show. The Valentine's show is likely me least favorite. First because it's Valentine's Day and we all know how I feel about day. But secondly most their songs are about love. Blech! We went to the early show, which thank God since I was getting sick. I never would have made it to the later show. We had a Dudley virgin amongst us. The Yank (PhotoGirl's hubby) hadn't had the privilege to see the boys. But I gathered he approved. I did take several videos (thanks to The Yank for figuring out how to use my new camera's video's ability), but none of them turned out well enough to earn a spot here. Others in attendance, Blueberry, The Newly Weds, HikerGirl and her new HikerBoy.

I did no walking this weekend. Blueberry and I planned a 7 mile walk, but I didn't feel like I could even manage a walk from my bed to the bathroom, so I knew 7 miles was out. I am feeling a bit anxious about not getting out this weekend. But I know I'd do myself no good if I were to go out while sick.

Does this blog seem more pink than others? It should. I'm writing it on my new Flamingo Pink laptop. See I ended up staying home today since I felt like crap. No reason to drag my butt into work and pass the gunk to any other poor unfortunate soul there. And as luck would have it, the Laptop was delivered. Yay! I didn't feel up to unpacking the box when it first got here, but then couldn't stand it. It's beautiful! It's pink!

Friday, February 08, 2008

Hairy ValenTimes


Tonight is the Dudley Manlove Valentine show. My mission tonight is to get a photo with Craig - whom I've chosen to be my Valentine this year. He's so lucky.

An enormous group of 8 of us will be there tonight. PhotoGirl and her husband - the Yank (I work with PhotoGirl and The Yank is part of this band) will be joining the crowd tonight. They're the newbies to my world of DMQ stalkers. Okay, so I'm the only stalker of the bunch, but Blueberry and HikerGirl are close seconds.

The show will be at the fantabulous Triple Door. The only thing sucky about this venue is they don't really have tables for larger crowds, so we might have to split up. We'll see. I've left Cynical Jenn at home today and instead have brought "Support Your Local Non Holiday Holiday Jenn"

I feel like crap today - I think trying to ward off some virus that's determined to slow me down. It's been a hellish week in which any project I've touched has crashed and burned. I'm convinced there's something in the air though. Everyone I've talked to has mentioned that things are just in an odd state of flux. (ahahhahaha I mistyped the word flux to flush which, to me, makes that sentence funny. No. I'm not taking any cold medication yet. This is just my odd ball self.) Anyhow, where was I? Oh yes, projects sucking. A couple of the gross margins of my projects have taken a dive so deep I don't think we'll recover from them. In fact, we may be paying Geeksoft. Sadly, some are my fault and some I couldn't really foresee. Either way, I feel like a crappy PM this week and can't help but wonder if I should have stayed with my original career plan to be the person to draw the maps in history books.

Okay, I'd better go do some project management. Ugh. But Dudley Tonight Yay! I'll be sure to give them a big smooch for all of you.

Wednesday, February 06, 2008

Treadmill: 1 Jenn: 0

I decided tonight upon returning from Happy Hour with BeagleBabe to go work out. I started on the elliptical rider and got bored after 10 minutes, so switched to the treadmill. I set it up to do some hill climbing. All was well for about 15 minutes, until...

See the treadmill doesn't have any type of water bottle holder - which seems weird to me. If I were ever to change jobs and design exercise equipment I'd not only make sure it was available in pink, I'd make damn sure it has a water bottle holder. Oh and an iPod or music thingy holder. Oh and maybe a hook for a towel.

But I digress. I nestled my water bottle between the bottom of the dash board panel and the pseudo bar - you see where this is going right? By the end of mile 1 I decided I needed a drink. I went to grab the water bottle and it slipped from my grasp. It landed with a resounding thud on the track of the treadmill. Now some would think I tripped on it, but in fact miraculously it shot - literally shot - off the treadmill like a bullet. Straight back in a direct line and landed - I kid you not - in the dispenser part of a coke machine. I got the giggles. I couldn't stop laughing. The ridiculousness of reliving that bullet like trajectory of a pink water bottle - even now I find myself tearing up with laughter.

It was during this laughing fit that I lost my footing and almost bit it. THEN I had this image of me shooting off the treadmill and suffering the same fate as the water bottle. Funny image to say the least.

So said pink water bottle is 24 ounces. I've had 6 of them today. I'm not math wizard, but according to my 10 fingers and 10 toes that's a 144 ounces of water (ok I cheated and used a calculator). I've now spent 10% of my day in the little girls room. As I finish the 6th bottle I can't help but wonder (or is it wander?) "how many times will I be getting up tonight?" And just to give you a glimpse into my head - scary as it is - the water bottle is made by Camelbak. Which if you rearrange the letters you get Clam Bake - which is a song Dudle (and Elvis) sing.




Big SHOUT out to fantastic cousin DWIGHT for his donation. I'm 8 % to my goal - which almost seems ridiculous to even type. So cousin DWIGHT - YOU ROCK!!!

Monday, February 04, 2008

The Squeemish Need Not Apply

Okay, so I have to share this with my fans - er ah - readers. However, if you are weak in the stomach and get grossed out easily you may want to look away and come back another day. Hah - look at me I'm a poet.

Ahem....

Most of you are aware I'm training for the 3-day walk in September. Along with this training, I decided it would be in my best interest to drop a few (or several) pounds. Walking as much as I have been and working out on the off days should just go hand in hand with losing weight.

Well, a friend this weekend recommended I consider taking this new fandangled "magic" drug called Alli to help with my weight loss. A magic drug? Wow, exactly what I've been waiting for! Knowing full well it is likely a piece of crap, I had no idea just how much of a piece of crap it is.

I decided instead of forking over my hard earned cash on seeing how it works, I'd *gasp* read about it first. And therein lies the gross factor.

I googled it and went to their "how does it work?" section of the website.

Oh.
My.
God.

It says, and I quote, " The active ingredient in alli attaches to some of the natural enzymes in the digestive system, preventing them from breaking down about a quarter of the fat you eat. Undigested fat cannot be absorbed and passes through the body naturally. The excess fat is not harmful. In fact, you may recognize it in the toilet as something that looks like the oil on top of a pizza. "

Okay, ewwwww....

If the last sentence isn't enough to talk you out of pizza for awhile, I don't know what is. But here's the kicker, they go on to say that by taking alli you may encounter "treatment effects" if you eat too much fat.

A- ha so that's where it works. It's a diuretic. Excellent.

The site goes on to warn you to not take it if you're at work or going to an event until you know how your body will react. And that you should also lower your fat intake as you take it so that you don't encounter the "treatment effects" as often. Ah, yah wouldn't that also help you lose weight? I'm just sayin.

So the end result is I won't be taking it. I'm doing fine where I am. 6.5 lbs down. Losing an average of 1 lb a week and that my friends is healthy.

That aforementioned hard earned cash now has to be put toward a laptop for home. My LT is dying a slow, painful death. Geeksquad this weekend quoted me $650 to fix it. At that price I figured why not fork over some mo'money and buy a new one. AND while I'm at it, why not buy a PINK one. I ordered a pink external hard drive and a pink mouse to match it. I know you're jealous!

Friday, February 01, 2008

30 Training Miles and Still going

Tonight, I passed a milestone. That sentence makes it sound like I passed a stone. If you know what i mean? And somehow I have the song 500 Miles in my head. Stop laughing PMDude!

Why 30 training miles was a milstone? I have no idea. 30 was my favorite birthday. 30 was the number of dollars Blueberry owed me last week. 30 was a nice round number that 10, 3, 5, 6, 15, and 2 go into easily. (There are probably more that go into 30, but I'm too tired to think about it).
So some type of motivational monster has a strong hold of me. It's shaking me to my core. It's rattling cynical Jenn right out of me. I've not had this kind of motivation ever. The inner voice is loud and its shouting. Which is good because when it whispers I never hear it. I'm not going to over analyze where it came from or why. Instead I'm going to take hold with both hands and hold on. Why question a good thing?

I sent a donation letter out a few random folks. Testing the water really just to see. I've been shocked by who has donated already AND who has promised a donation. My friend Gypsy has promised at least $100 and possibly $200 if she gets a job.

Gypsy? Odd name isn't it? Well, in true Jenn fashion it's not her real name. I change the names to protect the not so innocent. I'm choosing to call her Gypsy becasue the first day I met her was Halloween. My friend Kara was dragging me to an infamous "Mansion Halloween Party". In the early years of Geeksoft there was a bunch of boys who rented this kick ass mansion in a ritzy fritzy area of Seattle. They hired security, had bands on every floor, and held one awesome party. Gypsy and a friend of hers were coming with Kara and I. Gypsy shows up dressed as a Gypsy with wings. When I asked about the wings she said, "Well Duh, I'm a Gypsy Moth." Clever girl she is.

She is quite possibly one of the funniest and most animated person I have ever met. She is definitely on the top 5 of Jenn's list of people who should be allowed into heaven. Anyhow, Gypsy walked in the 3-day a couple fo years ago. And sent me an email with "advice" and "lessons learned". I laughed out loud as I read it. Below are some excerps.

"OMG … I did this walk a … handful of years ago. Thrilled I did it once … swore I’d never do it again … but promised I would give at least $100 to the next in line to try. Just about killed me. OH … and it really almost killed one of the women I walked with. Dork refused to drink Gatorade. OK … So … who doesn’t hate to drink Gatorade????!!!! … but if it saves your life … keeps you from getting hauled off to the hospital for dehydration … wouldn’t you drink the damn Gatorade??

DRINK THE DAMN GATORADE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I MEAN IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

There are a couple theories going into this …. Only one is sanctioned… I came up with the other.
*Don’t bother with the schedule. If you never do any working out, your body won’t know what hit it for at least a couple days and hopefully you’ll either be done with the walk or on day 3 and almost done before your body figures it out…

Good safety tip…
OH … and it’s probably a good idea to start eating only potato chips, bananas, peanut butter, bagels and Gatorade as your primary diet a week before you head out … so that your body doesn’t freak out and have horrendous diarrhea issues at about noon on day 2. BUT if this happens … I have found that a quick trip into a fast food location for like … “mexi fries” can easily get you back on track … carry some cash…

OK … so here are a couple heads up.

Day one:
*Piece of cake. OK … a 20 mile piece of cake. You’re probably too young to remember walkathons that were actually 20 miles and not … 20K…
*At the end of day one … you will sit down to dinner at a plate of food so large you think you can’t possibly eat it all. And in an instant… all the food will be gone. I actually asked my buddies … “where did all my food go?” … To which they said… “um … you ate it”.
*Day one when you get to camp … there will be crazy people who will… somehow … dance all night. Personally, it was all I could do to shower/shampoo/shine for the next day’s walk … I’m sure I stunk to the high heavens… oh wait I didn’t shower… I didn’t do any of that, because my tent and sleeping bag were like sirens… calling to me. Male sirens… ;+)

Day two:
*This is a horrible day. You have been warned.
*Your shoes will feel 3 sizes too small and if you have blisters it will be even worse. ;+)
*So it’s going to be the same length as day one … but it’s not new. And it’s the same length as day 3 … but your not done.
*This day will suck. If you have any Percocet … alcohol … bring it. I didn’t need it, but I knew I had it. And that made all the difference.
*Take a shower before you go to bed … no matter how much it might kill you. For … tomorrow, they will be taking pictures of you along the way and at the finish. Plus … it’s probably over due.

Day three:
*A lot like day 1 with … way more aches and pains … and probably blisters.
*BUT… there is an end in site.
*I found that when my group sang “I like big butts” it really made the time “fly”. (Learn the lyrics)
*And … I still have yet to feel the sense of accomplishment as I did when I finished this trek.

Good luck to you my friend. You will not need it, but it will be nice to know you have it.

My two best tips?
*Drink something when anyone honks… make it a game.
*Drink Gatorade every 3rd drink.
*You will eat weird food. If you’re not lucky enough to “lose” your tent mate to dehydration … be sure you bring something to help you with boofies… had I had a roommate that first night, I’m sure I would have silently killed her in the night. Tents don’t have gas sensors.

OK … I love you. I pledge a donation … just holding out to double it.
Please let me know your route. One of the nicest.. pleasant wastes of time… was seeing people on the route. And no I promise I won’t deliver you to the next stop. LOL"