Oh look at that. An entire week has gone by without me gracing you with my witty, and brilliant pros. Hah.
It appears not a lot has been going on in my life. And, in fact, I've been feeling a bit abandoned by friends. This abandonment has caused me to do some serious thinking about the quality of people in my life and decide how much effort I really want to put in to a mediocre relationship.
I am definitely a home-body these days and while I like it to some extent, I do like hanging with friends. For the past 3 or 4 weeks "friends" I usually hang with seem to have other, more important, things going on and I have fallen to the bottom the priority list. That's fine. I get it. Life ebbs and flows. I sure hope it ebbs back up in my direction.
And before you ask, yes, I've reached out to these friends. And I've been pushed aside each time. So now I'm at the point where my stubbornness has kicked in and I'm tired of being the one to reach out. Thus my comment about mediocre relationships. I'm tired of being the one to make the effort.
I spent the weekend doing a lot of thinking about my current situation and I've decided, I need more friends. That's the easy part. The hard part is finding more friends. There's something odd that happens as you age, the going out and meeting new people is more difficult and seems to take a LOT more time and energy. I'm willing to put that time and energy in, but then I ask myself, "Where?" So my next step is to find the "where".
So besides my feeling sorry for myself and lonely, I did get some serious scrapbooking done this weekend. The irony wasn't lost on me that I was sitting in my scrapbook room, alone, scrapping about happier times with people I barely see these days. In fact, at one point this weekend, I got boxes from the garage and was going to pack the entire scrapbook room up and sale it. I figured I could go on one helluva vacation, by myself, with all the stupid supplies that I no longer felt I needed. Then I took a breath and just existed for a moment. Next thing I knew, my 2012 3Day scrapbook was done. Woot!
I also managed to miss my 5K run this weekend. I set my alarm to get up super early, get there early to get good parking, and then sit in a Starbucks until it was time for the run. When I set my alarm I set it for 6:15PM instead of AM. I woke up about 8:15 and just stared at the clock. How could that have happened? I never sleep through an alarm. Then I looked and found out I didn't sleep through it because it hadn't gone off yet. Anyhow, my race started at 9:30 and the prospect of getting to Mercer Island with 12,000 or more and trying to find parking and then get to the start line was just not going to happen. So I laced up the shoes and did a little wog myself. Didn't go very far - but I got out.
This week we're upping the running by adding a day. I really need to get to it if I'm going to jog all the 5K of the Race for the Cure.
3 comments:
I know what you mean about friends. I feel abandoned sometimes, too, and I wonder if it's because I'm in a peculiar kind of situation, being 40, unmarried, and childless. And yes, it is very hard to make friends as an adult! Unless you have a blog, then you can meet some super cool people that way, although they're not always close geographically...
So yeah, I don't have any pearls of wisdom here, but I did want to comment to say "Yup, I get it."
Jenn, I am pretty positive you aren't talking about me, but you know me and my personality... I have a hard time staying in contact, it's just me, I think I have always been that way (a recent blog post kind of went into that, but it had a different angle). I have never been a social butterfly type but I like coming along for the ride, being in the shadows--I'm comfy with and usually need the prod--errr call! to come over/hangout.
The rhythm I've gotten used to is finding life where I am. I have one friend where she knows the total down and dirty and we talk/get together at least a couple of times a week (sometimes more), but I have others that I know mostly from kids' stuff where we will meet up (usually with the monsters in tow)... that is a different feel, and I'd describe those friendships as vagabond type relationships. There is one person that I think would be easy to get together with and talk to outside of the commonality of kids though, I'm sure there are others but that's just my thought right now.
But know one thing for sure, we don't see each other a lot, but I would find it extremely easy to just pick back up again with you. And, I could easily go in deeper with you at any time too. I think it's just the way you are, and I think that is the great thing about you, Jenn.
Anyway... I had been thinking about a response since Monday because I thought this was a good blog post but then my mind would get pulled somewhere else. Adult ADHD I believe.
Melissa - Your safe. It's totally not you. But I bet you can guess who it might be.
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