I must be predisposed to stupidity

I'm sure it's not just me, but there are days I feel like I am the only idiot out there. (No comments from the peanut gallery please).

Some of my long time readers know of the Crush, who then became the XCrush. Well the XCrush is possibly back to being a Crush (insert my predisposition to stupidity here). If I could figure out why I'm so attracted to this guy I could possibly counter any and all feelings by logic, which as you all are aware, logic has nothing to do with feelings and relationships.

But I digress...let me tell you a story. Sit back. Get a beer. It might be a long one. And anyone who thinks they don't need to know such details about me (sister, daughter, co-worker, friend) stop reading. Spoilers ahead!

If one were to search on the word "crush" in my blog, one would be surprised how much I use that word. Mind you not all related to the actual crush, many related to DMQ - coincidence?

So I've liked this guy for WAY too long and have always been a pansy about saying anything. It was far better, in my mind, to not say anything and live in this fantasy world of "what if". I know logically it's a silly place to be, but fun none the less. Anyhow, I met the Crush in a PM class and never got up enough nerve to actually talk to him. So I suppose I didn't really "meet" him, I was attracted to him from afar - which happens frequently in my life. The class ended and I assumed so did any chance of me getting to know him. Then he showed up again in my life in a capacity that allowed for me to "get to know" him. Then through the past year and a half I've been "getting to know" him.

Yes, read that sentence again YEAR AND A HALF. I've flirted - apparently now well enough and have made it somewhat know of my interest by merely inviting him to do things - which he's done on several occasions. So he must enjoy my company at the very least, right?

Fast forward to the beginning of this summer. I had mentioned last year the possibility of going to Westport for a "get out of dodge" adventure to take the Mustang on. Last summer didn't work out for various reasons I'm not compelled to bore you with. This summer, we made a plan. We talked and we decided on a weekend, in which I thought meant a day. This is where the Men are From Mars theory proves itself once again. I (Venus) was thinking day trip, he (Mars) was thinking weekend trip.

So weekend trip is it.

I started calling places to stay and in short order determined that the "beach" during the summer is a very difficult place to get any reservations. My main concern was sleeping arrangements. I didn't want to assume one bed. While I'd be fine with that - I didn't want to presume that he would be fine with that. And my desire for two beds guaranteed, at least a little, that I'd get more sleep than if I were in one bed. NOT for the reason you filthy minded people are thinking (my mother reads this for heaven's sake - although she'd be likely to root me on...) but more for my anxiety of spending time, in a bed, with a boy whom I like...I mean he'd see my human" side not my "girly - well prepared - well put together" side of which he is accustomed to seeing now. The cook, the hostess, the girl who can project manage.

And so, I searched for a two bed scenario. After calling about 20 hotels I was left with a small option. And by small, I mean small.

And so we reach my situation. Mildly amusing for many, not so amusing for me. I have reserved a room at a hotel in which the only room available has a long double bed. What does that mean? It means a bed the width of a double, length of a queen. Do any of you see my dilemma? I WILL BE STAYING in a very small bed with a guy I like! A double bed? My cat's bed is bigger than a double bed. Oh the horror!

For those "friends" out there who have provided me with your advice, I thank you...I think. I won't bore you with the details, just suffice it to say I'm only considering a small portion of said advice since the rest of the advice is, well, race-y. For those who have not participated in the advice giving, please do feel free to leave any if you feel so inclined.

And in case you're wondering, I'm only on chapter 10 of HP. I did, however, read the last chapter. What? I can't help it! I told you, I'm predisposed to stupidity.