Date #1 in (insert large amount of years here). I've done a lot of thinking of late about men and more importantly what I really truly want in a relationship. And if I want a relationship at all. I've been single so long I'm not sure I could find room in my life for a guy. He'd have to be special that's for sure. I'm well aware of my "flaws" and even more aware of my qualities (there are many - just ask me). But am I aware enough? Am I truly ready to start down a new path of discovering myself with someone else? Of course, I have no answer yet, and may be jumping the gun a bit. But that's the PM coming out in my. Risk management baby!
I think back to a conversation I've had with my dad after XBF (xboyfriend) and I split. My dad's comment to me was that I was too particular and picky and that I should just - well basically - settle. I didn't agree then and I don't agree now. I think its only fair to me, and ultimately to him to be particular and specific. If I wanted to settle I would have married Crazy High School BF. (Which just makes me shudder a bit). I've known people who have settled and seeing them after years of living with someone that is "just okay" really isn't where I want to be in 10 years. I'd rather be single then with someone who's "just okay." It seems so daunting and tiring to think about spending years with someone who is "just okay."
I don't want mr. whomever to complete me. I think that's crap. I'm complete enough without a guy. Or at least I think I am. But I would like mr. whomever to at least challenge me, to argue with me, to partner with me , to at least have an understanding of me (good luck with that), to laugh with me, etc. I don't have, or want, any specifics because I think that limits me and my vision of who this person is.
So tonight - I'll put on my best smile, and bring out my most treasured charm and we'll see what happens.
As they say in the UK, "Watch this space..."
As for Database God. He's apparently fallen off the face of the earth. Good riddance! I don't have time to waste on people who don't have time to waste on me. Wait? Is that right?
4 comments:
Good luck!
I agree with what you said about not needing someone to complete you. Amen, sister! I hear all that "you complete me" or "he's my soulmate!" crap and it makes me cringe. I don't buy any of it either!
I don't think there's anything wrong with being picky. You have to make sure you're going to be happy and satisfied. The right one will be out there, and if he doesn't meet ALL your expectations, you'll know if you're willing to forgive that.
Have a great time, girl!! And amen that you've been single for awhile and aren't afraid to go after what you want.
Hmmmmmmmmmm....You should never *settle*, but remember: No one is *perfect*. We all have flaws, there will be fights, life is not always wonderful, even with *Mr. Right*.
Hey Jenn, Don't be so quick to play defense and lower your expectations. It may be online dating but some of the best people I know I met through online dating.
:)
I hope tonight went well.
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