Tuesday, October 21, 2008

News Flash: Three young crustaceans and an old crab escape from Alcatraz



San Francisco, Ca - Alcatraz is the most difficult maximum security prison in the country to escape from. Many have tried, and many have failed. Yesterday a small band of crabs escaped with little or no problems. The lead crab is reported to have a small back problem that is slowing her down. One of the other crabs is having a foot problem and is most likely going to be as slow as the older crab. They are armed with credit cards and a map. They appear to be somewhat harmless, but be careful if you find yourself between them and a chocolate factory. They were last seen sipping a cup of world famous Irish Coffee. They should only be approached if you're a sugar daddy looking to take care of one of the single younger crabs.


In other news, the crabs will be touring the city on the world famous San Francisco cable cars. There are two lines that will take them up the Ricearoni hill and a couple of the other larger hills of SF. They will also be visiting an In-N-Out burger shop tomorrow to celebrate it's 60th Anniversary. The crabs will be seen walking sideways through the line at In-N-Out. Definitely approach with extreme caution when burger is in hand.

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